Burning Question #44: 2019 Resolutions

Get it together Gentlemen!

Happy New Year. It is now 2019 and time for Burning Question #44.

Every January 1st people resolve to get organized, lose weight, learn to sing, be a better parent, become a Vampire, write that novel, blog every single friggin day, write poetry more, or do SOMETHING they’ve been putting off. It is called RESOLUTIONS.

The other day a friend of mine told me that she does unresolutions. She gets rid of something. This year she decided not to wear skirts for work anymore. Last year it was to get rid of pantyhose. Another year she got rid of something else she didn’t like to do.

Burning Question #44: Do you have any resolutions for 2019?

Note: YOU, yes YOU, can click as many answers as you want on this poll. Don’t feel like you have to limit yourself.

 

Are you going to cook more meals at home in 2019?

But seriously, did you make any resolutions for 2019? What do you plan on doing or not doing? Do you care? Let us know. Leave a comment below. Leave a bunch of comments. Do whatever you want. You can’t even leave an unrelated comment. I don’t care (yes I do. I want you to leave a comment.)

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

 

 

Savor

As I walked downstairs from my bedroom I wondered how many tons of cat vomit is flushed down toilets each year?

At 4:12 a.m. the dog had asked to go out. As I made it to the entryway I saw that the poor thing couldn’t wait. She had tummy troubles and made a huge mess. She is a large dog at 85 pounds, so believe me it was a huge mess. After taking a large bag full of the mess out to the garbage I sprayed the carpet and now I’m waiting to scrub it. Fortunately for me the carpet is being replaced with hardwood floors soon.

So what does this have to do with parenting, vampires, or having an empty nest?

My nest is not so empty. Since there are no children in the house the animals are all more aware of MOM. We are all adjusting. The cats are eating quicker and barfing because the dog is trying to eat their food. The dog is eating cat food and getting huge runny poops. I’m trying to give all of them extra attention.

In the meantime my adult children, young but still adults now, are keeping in touch this week though the magic of the smart phone.

I just received photos of costumes from Paramount Studios, and last night photos from Griffith Park Observatory (yes, the one in LA LA Land.)

Then photos came of Pike Place Market and a friend’s new beard. This is the first beard of the group. It is well groomed, blonde, and a new trendy hair cut. Looks good.

They’re on winter break from school and off with friends, one north, and one south.

When I was that age I also tumbled into adventures, and unfortunately more misadventures. If I had the resources, and the wherewithal kids had now… Yes, I think how different it might have been, but does that matter? I’ll let my alternate universe self deal with that. I’m just happy beyond words to see I’ve given my kids the tools they need. Yes, they have those phones, but there are so many more tools one must have.

They’re curious, and full of adventure. They smart. They’re cautious. They’re playful. They’re young and without fear of the unknown.

The other day Nigel the Ghost, who left his body, ok died, around the age of 26 or 27, told me to tell my kids to treasure their youth and make the most of it.

I was feeling snarky so I said, “we’re Vampires.”

Then he said, “then treasure it all the more.”

He is right. And so, no matter who we are, what we are, or how we live, we should treasure everyday, and every experience.

I thought about all of the adventures I’ve been on with my children. There will be many more to come, and I am glad they are having their own adventures as well now. They’re building their libraries of wonderful memories. Yes, I wish I was there, but like I said, we will have our adventures too.

A new lesson for our adult children should be to savor the moments. Plan fun. Continue to play. Take breaks. Watch for falling stars. And to continue to treasure those you love.

Tell them, as they grow older, they should keep an open mind as well. My mind is much more open now than it was when I was a clueless eighteen year old.

Just remember, and this is coming from an old Vampire, to savor all moments. Even if it is just petting a cat who leans against your leg, or the quiet of a cold winter night.

xoxo

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

 

What? I’m sorry I wasn’t listening. Thoughts on a New Year.

Happy New Year. I’m watching the 2019 Rose Parade, drinking coffee, and sitting with my cat. One of the cats at least. The other one went screaming upstairs and the dog followed him. The husband is still asleep. The children are elsewhere with friends.

The Ghost was out standing by my back fence this morning. He turned, giving me a neutral look then vanished. Not so much as a wave. He didn’t even flip me off.

I don’t have any resolutions this year, just thoughts and suggestions for everyone who reads this.

Write more.

Create art

Tell WordPress that the new “block” editor sucks. Programmers aren’t writers. Yes, I did hear all about it at the local WordCamp. I was even a speaker there but I had no idea they’d just add another level of hell to my blog. I can’t even easily choose categories anymore to lure unsuspecting readers to my blog.

  • I just looked it up. I have to designate this as a “list block” from yet another menu. I know, I’m a smart cookie and will get the hang of it. I should be more positive about change, but I’m an old Vampire.
  • My children (now 19 and 22) keep me young and current.
  • Stay current. Don’t be an old fart.
  • Stop listening to the news or talking about politics for at least five days each week. Nothing, aside from becoming a Vampire, will add more years to your life span.
  • Be positive and stop complaining about software upgrades the don’t make any sense (see above about politics.)
  • Watch birds. Watch them.
  • Cats
  • Dogs
  • Listen to your kids
  • Talk with your kids (not at them)
  • Plan to play.

I’m stopping here to talk about PLAY. We all need to play. Play helps children develop into decent human beings. It helps adults unwind. We need play. So do something this year. Go to a zoo. Play Cards Against Humanity and laugh yourself silly. Go to an art museum. Never say you don’t like museums. Put on some music and dance. Go for a walk. Write a blog. Fly a kite. Be silly. Stop being so serious all the time.

That is it for now. I have a Ghost to go hassle.

Happy New Year everyone.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

Short Story Sunday: The Morning After

“I told her I don’t eat human flesh, I only drink blood,” said James. “Then she rolled her eyes at me. Can you believe it? She believes that I’m a Vampire but she wouldn’t believe a God Damn word I said to her.”

“So I take it you don’t have a date for tonight,” said Andy.

“No, I am free. Completely free to enjoy company of women who appreciate me. By the way, is it just Vampires tonight or are any warm blooded people showing up?”

“It will be a mix. Everyone is cool. Cool as in temperament not temperature.”

“Good. I swear I should have pegged her as a bigot. She knew I was a Vampire when I met her. She knew we’re real, but she would never accept me. Never.”

“It wasn’t like you were exclusive with her. Screw her.”

“I did. That’s what got me into trouble,” said James, then he laughed. “You’d think that after 164 years… who am I kidding. The only woman I can’t get is your sister.”

Andy raised an eyebrow. Sure James was a pig but he’d been Andy’s best friend forever and most of it was an act…a small fraction was an act.

James continued his venting. “The only reason she didn’t go after me more is because she knows I can erase her memory, and if she tells anyone I’m a Vampire they’ll think she’s nuts.”

“Forget her James,” said Andy. “I’ve never seen you so insecure. What’s up?”

“Nothing. I was up too late last night. I’m hungry. I obviously didn’t eat anything last night.”

“I have blood in the fridge, and some cheese. Go get yourself something.”

“Thanks,” said James, heading out to the kitchen.

Andy looked around the room. There would be about fifty people over for New Year’s Eve. He still had to bring out all of the glasses, wine, and call the caterer for a final check.

Once James got dressed and the party started he’d be fine. He’d be more than fine. There wouldn’t be a single female at the party, Vampire, warm blooded human, Werewolf, or otherwise he wouldn’t be flirting with. James never went home alone.

It would be a new year but some guys never changed. That wasn’t always a bad thing. Just a thing.

Andy pulled out his phone and left a message. “Hey beautiful. Just wanted to tell you I love you. I’ll see you tonight. I can’t wait.”

~ end


Burning Question #43: Humor me

Wow. Burning Question #43 is upon us. And I have NOTHING to add to this except some memes that have nothing to do with this. But maybe they do…

So you run into a Vampire in a dark alley. It’s fangs are out. You aren’t wearing a scarf. Then it tells you a joke. Do you laugh?

Burning Question #43: Do Vampires Have a Biting Sense of Humor?

Thanks for answering the poll. Feel free to leave comments about humor, Vampires, wombats, or anything you want.

I know, I know, I usually try to write something funny, but it is just one of those days. It isn’t bad… I just can’t think of anything today.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman