Halloween is almost here and that means scary stuff. Unfortunately not all scary stuff is fun.
A while back, a long while back I let a “friend” stay with me for a few days. That turned into a few weeks, all the while she transformed herself into me. Yes, it was just like at movie “Single White Female.” I kicked her out, without the violence of the movie, but I was still creeped out and pissed off for a long long time.
Nobody like to be cloned, copied or duplicated without permission. I know, being a creative professional I should know that people are going to copy my ideas, but it still pisses me off to no end, especially when they aren’t even sneaky about it. But I just buck up and decide to be the adult and say “I’m flattered they copied me.” I know that is bull shit but it is usually the adult thing to do.
But sometimes when I tell my kids the whole flattery line it rings flat and false.
Garrett (17) has been experiencing his own “Single White Female”. For those who don’t remember, Single White Female is a movie about a crazy roommate who copies everything the heroine of the movie does (everything) and sooner or later tries to take over her life in horrifying results. Anyway, my son said he was feeling like that.
Be it a short story he has written, or what he is listening to, or a charity event he is doing, Ramona does the same thing. Sometimes she even does it at the same time. Garrett was livid when he went to school and she was wearing the same thing as he was. He was even more livid when she copied one of his story plot lines for her English class. He was livid when she picked the same unusual theme for a history research project.
I told him that when she copies him exactly or out and out steals then he needs to go to the teachers, otherwise he just needs to let it go. Or he could call her out, but that could backfire.
He said that what she is doing is just plain rude.
Being a Vampire teen, he knows that he walks a fine line. Back in the old days yes, he could have terrorized her to no end. He could still terrorize her but that would be bullying and foolish. He could even put thoughts into her head and get her to do something else, like hate him, but there again, that would be foolish.
“Just take a deep breath” and be flattered I told him.
“She takes credit for my ideas,” said my frustrated son.
For someone who always prided himself on creativity and being a bit different this has been quite a blow for Garrett. I tell him that he can be flattered or offended, but that he needs to just get over it. She isn’t harming him, except to his ego. Eventually it will backfire and she’ll find someone else to copy or get her own ideas. Maybe another friend will call her out on it.
“Does he have a crush on you? A lot of times people will copy things about people they think they’re in love with. You know, listen to their music, dress the same, write the same stories, apply for the same colleges.”
He said that would be the worst nightmare ever. And thank goodness she didn’t apply for the same colleges, at least as far as he knew. He didn’t know if she had a crush on him, but he thought it was a weird way to show it.
If she does something that interferes with his life, starts to stalk him or just plain cheats by copying one of his assignments, then he needs to take action. Otherwise, like most annoying things in life…ignore it and it will go away.
But I still don’t blame him for being royally pissed off.
~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman