In the dark cold night

Sometimes

Even Vampires

Are too tired

For overt romance

Yes it is always

Nice to find a cold hand

A cold heart

And a cool even stare

That brings comfort

And love

With a friend

In the dark cold night

 

Tucked away

Tucked away in the shadows of the night, we gather together with dim lights and candles.

Our faces bright and alive. I’ll catch a smile or a laugh. Even when it is only us we’ll still be holding our collective secrets close to our hearts.

There are those times when we want to be separate from the rest of the world, and just be us without pretending or hiding.

Of course at home I don’t even think about it. Most of the time none of us do. Then again, sometimes the isolation makes all of us a little somber. A little colder and a little bit more hungry.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

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Heart & Soul: Vampires & Ghosts – More Musings from a Vampire Maman

butterflyClara said “It would be weird living in the White House with tours all the time. I mean, like, it would be weird hanging out at home and having a tour go by.”

I told my 14 year old that the White House was quite large and that I didn’t believe tours covered the private family quarters, except maybe some of the guest rooms like the Lincoln Bedroom. After a bit of discussion I explained that some people believe that Lincoln’s ghost still haunts the place.

“Why would he want to haunt people there?” The child asked. “He wouldn’t want to scare anyone.”

“Haunting isn’t always scaring. But he was murdered and that is why he is a ghost. Most ghosts are those who are killed before their time or murdered.”

More lessons in history.

School, that is High School has been uneventful this new school year. That is a good thing. Clara was asked to be on the Cross Country team (but turned it down.)  The teachers are all good now and getting to know her and appreciate the unique spirits of all of the kids. That is what teachers do. She is making a lot of new friends – a good thing.

Garrett is having the time of his life as a Senior looking forward to school and being on the top of the high school totem pole.

I found a note he’d written, in the dryer as usual.

No matter

No matter when

No matter where

No matter who you are with

No matter who I am with

We will always love

Each other

Because we are of the shadows

Children of the moon and stars

Darkness surrounds us

But light stays in our heart

And souls

Huh.

I  love Ione but her family is, well, not exactly the kind any Modern Vampire would want their son to marry into. Not her parents. Her parents are some of our best friends, but it is the community they used to belong to.

They were the kind of Vampires that inhabit nightmares. Their purpose in life, if you can call it that, is to be a predator. They don’t give back, they don’t have relationships of any kind with humans, they don’t care. They’ll sooner suck out your soul and let their own soul die than to be a part of human society. They are the undead and those without souls or at least that is what we (the Modern Vampires) say. It is hard to explain. Anyway… I can deal with them and can logically say that their lifestyle is their choice. They leave us alone, we leave them alone for the most part. Our paths cross. But I can’t trust them. And I won’t trust them around my Modern Vampire Children.

We all have had people like that in our lives.

Ione’s  mom Violet dropped her off and stayed to visit a while. She worried as well that those who live in the shadows with dead souls would come after her kids. I assured her that she was doing a great job with her girls and didn’t need to worry about it. But she’ll worry. So will I. We’re moms. Worry is what we do, even if we are Vampire moms.

I was going to write on something else, not the blog, the never ending book that scares me more than any Vampire or Werewolf or Ghost…

When I hear someone softly singing “Heart and Soul”, you know the song…

Heart and soul, I fell in love with you, 
Heart and soul, the way a fool would do, 
Madly… 
Because you held me tight, 
And stole a kiss in the night… 

Heart and soul, I begged to be adored, 
Lost control, and tumbled overboard, 
Gladly… 
That magic night we kissed, 
There in the moon mist.

Oh! but your lips were thrilling, much too thrilling, 
Never before were mine so strangely willing.

But now I see, what one embrace can do, 
Look at me, it’s got me loving you, 
Madly… 
That little kiss you stole, 
Held all my heart and soul.

I turned around to face the Ghost.

He gave me a smile that made me uncomfortable. “If I was human and you were human and we were both single…there in the moon mist, with your lips so thrilling…”

“What do you want?” I asked him. Damn he is annoying.

“You know I was murdered.”

“I figured. We’ve talked about this before,”  I answered. Sometimes I wonder what he did to deserve it other than being annoying and talking too much.

He put his hands down as if to touch me and I watched it go through my shoulder. “I don’t know who killed me,” said the ghost.

“If you find out will you go away?”

He shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know Juliette. I just don’t know. Weird how these things happen. And speaking of weird…”

Then he vanished as if someone had blown out a candle.

I swear, nothing gives a Vampire the creeps more than a ghost.  But on the other hand…

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

Vampire Maman

That was not my friend

Let me remember

My friend

In my own heart

With my own memories

And the love

I had.

Don’t tell me

What was said after

How other said he was

Stories of things

I don’t want to hear

Because that was not

My friend.

The long years make things softer and memories not so jagged, but sometime those dusty file drawers in one’s brain get lodged open and make a line directly for the heart. I can’t take more in those drawers or in my heart.

As my children grow older I know that their now sparkling and new file drawers in their brains are neat and ordered. Their hearts are light. Over the years the dust will fall. I think of the young people, or anyone who saw that burden on their hearts as too much and the sadness and pain seems so overwhelming. So in honor of your love, remember those who passed in darkness with light, and love and hope for those you will meet one day.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

Moth

Sleep – taunts me like an unfaithful lover

You are there beside me

In the darkness

My hand touches your shoulder

Quiet as the dead

Lost in your dreams to me.

Sleep and I have never been friends. It taunts me like a unfaithful lover. And I want the pleasures and rewards it has to offer but I hate it for toying with me, keeping me hanging on, filling my nights with lies and broken promises of sweet slumbers. Damn it.

Even when I lived as a night creature sleep still teased and taunted me.

So now I’m up with the cat who rubs against my legs and embraces sleep as his best friend in the entire universe.

My husband sleeps quietly as do my children in their dream worlds, unburdened by Sleep poking them with sticks, taunting, jeering, whispering lies and taking away what is mine.

It is a sad thing indeed when a modern Vampire has insomnia and Monday morning lingers. We are creatures of the night but with parenthood and other concerns have been forced to live during the daytime.

~ Juliette