Vampire Vegas

I’m in Las Vegas.

Unfortunately I didn’t bring Vlad with me because his reactions would have been priceless.

For the past two weeks I’ve been on the road from Northern California, to Lincoln, Nebraska (for the National Roller Skating Championships), and all points in-between. Now we’re (my daughter and I) on our way home – stopping in Las Vegas for a few days to visit friends.

Vampire friends of course – my friend Amelia and her family.

Las Vegas Vampires are completely different kind of Vampires, as you can imagine. The lifestyle is completely over the top. That said, it isn’t a free for all. It is savvy, calculated, and over the top in just about every way one can imagine.

Nobody goes to Las Vegas expecting to run into Vampires, and the Vampires here like to keep it that way.

Amelia always shows up exquisitely dressed in her vintage (and vintage) inspired dresses, and knocks the socks off anyone looking for sophisticated old Vegas elegance. It is a joy to see.

In the clubs at night, by the pools, in the bars, dancing to the music, in tight short skirts, and elegant trendy menswear, the Vampires charm, and seduce. Everyone has a good time. I can guarantee you that. Sure there are a few stiff necks, and major headaches in the morning but we don’t care.  Should we? Not really. Everybody got exactly what they wanted.

So what’s on the agenda for the rest of the week, summer, year… forever?

We’re having more adventures for the next few days, then heading back up home to my husband Teddy, our pets, and the rest of our crew.

Hey, if you’re in Las Vegas make sure you check out the Arts District. Search on Arts District Las Vegas or go to Twitter at #artsdistrictlv  and visit http://msmercantilelv.com, and http://mainstreet.vegas

I’ll keep you posted on more adventures.

 

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

 

 

 

From the City that Nevsky Sleeps

A Guest Post From My Dearest Vampire Friend Amelia

It was a Friday night in the city that never sleeps. No, not New York. Las Vegas. Land of glitter and sleaze, neon and nightclubs; where we’d just as soon blow up our old buildings than redecorate. Viva Las Vegas! It was early June 2011 and my friend had come for a much needed visit. For me. Juliette is kind that way. I get sad, she comes and visits. I’m not nearly as good a friend. But then it’s me that gets tired of the grind of life. Or rather death. Maybe I should look into a different line of work. Life as a contract worker for several dystopian bureaucrats takes its toll, eventually. Believe me. Everything you’ve seen in the movies about being someone whose job it is to terminate others with extreme prejudice? Make it 1,000 times more boring and 1,000 times more deadly. Even a vampire can get tired of slogging through the grind of tracking a difficult hit and then dealing with the gore when it doesn’t go quite as planned. Juliette understands I have my moments after a particularly difficult job. She always seems to have her head on straight. But she’s willing to blow off steam, hence her volunteering to come cheer me up and our subsequent trip down to The Strip.

I steered Juliette through the casino floor bar at the Cosmopolitan, up the steps to the private cocktail lounge on the third level of the Chandelier. The first floor is to die for beautiful and best for people watching but it was getting late and the normal Friday night crowd could pack it in. The second floor, just as lovely, is very small in my opinion and a little two conspicuous for two vampire lovelies looking for a nip. “White Russian or black Russian?”

“Black. You know I like my brunettes…” she answered with a laugh. I love Juliette’s laugh. It always makes me smile and God He knows, I need to smile more often.

“Just so you know, I’ve lined up a few delicious ex-pats I found on InterNations. Goodness, they’re eager to meet up. Oh, by the way, how is your Russian? I told them you were born in Warsaw to a Czech mother after she was raped by Soviet soldier during the Prague Spring invasion. But the father later repented and came back for you and your mother. You immigrated to California when you were four.”

“OH MY GOSH, you didn’t! You’re incorrigible, Amelia!” Again, that laugh.”No. I didn’t. I told them you’re a descendent of Alexander Nevsky and were willing to sell a few holy indulgences for their forgiven sins.”

“Not very likely on any count. Nevsky was a saint. No descendents. I’m not a Catholic priest so I pretty sure I’m not in a category to forgive any sort of sin and NEWSFLASH: indulgences haven’t been for sale for several centuries. Where HAVE you been hiding out?” She linked her arm in mine as she finished climbing the steps. “Oh, don’t worry, I’ll promise them something I’m sure we’ll all enjoy,” she added with a wicked smile and just a hint of fang. Now it was my turn to laugh.

“Добрый вечер, Анатолий Викторович. This is my friend Juliette,” I paused at the top of the stairs, greeting our first event for the evening.

~ Amelia

 

 

Thank you so much dear Amelia for this wonderful and flattering post. Now I laugh.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

Now it is time for cocktails:

White Russian

2 parts Vodka

1 part Kahula

1 part heavy cream or half & half

Pour over ice, stir, enjoy.

 

Black Russian

2 parts Vodka

1 part Kahula

1 part heavy cream or half & half

Pour over ice, stir, enjoy. Add a cherry on top if you’re feeling extra festive.

Enjoy. Cheers!

 

Cheers!

Cheers!

What Happens in Vegas…2013 Vampire Roadtrip Continues

Vampire Roadtrip

Vampire Roadtrip

Kids are going to be who they’re going to be. You never know who you’re going to give birth to. But I can say I definitely gave birth to my daughter. She doesn’t look like me but we are so much alike. We’ve been on the road for 5 days and it has been a riot. I mean that in a fun way, not a destructive breaking windows and looting way. Anyway…today we arrived in Las Vegas.

It is HOT and blazing Hell-like sunny. Hence, I sit in the cool and dark writing this because I’ve had way too much exposure and risked frying myself to a crisp and going into some sort of heat related Vampire coma. But we’re now In Las Vegas – where the night will come and the sky will be awash in lights and life and a regular feast for the eyes – and a feast for Vampires.

We’re sending the kids off to the water park tonight. A regular buffet for hungry Vampire teens and talk about “fast food”.  And it is fun. Hey, if anyone tells you Vampires don’t have fun they’re wrong. Vampire teens always know how to have fun. Fun is their code.

For the adults there are other entertainments and other places to dine. Many more places.

My dear friend Amelia lives in Las Vegas with her daughter and husband. Amelia and I were both born the same year (1859) and have known each other since we were the same ages as our daughters (14).

Amelia stretched out her long legs in her ultra modern and cool living room and gave me one of “those looks”. “Guess who is back in town?”

I could feel my lip twitch in disgust. I knew who she was talking about. It was Don. Disgusting Don who gives all Modern Vampires and all Males of any species a bad name. Ugh. I swore that last time I saw him that I’d kill him. Not nice, but he is lower than a roach in my book. He’d abuse the lower forms of Vampire women and Regular Humans as well. He was scum. He needed to go away. Amelia and I decided that WE were going to make him go away.

I could just see him in a shiny black suit, a silver shirt unbuttoned down the front, gold chains, dark hair slicked back, 8 diamond rings and just a hint of eyeliner.

Of course there was the scent that clung to the air as he passed by – a mixture of blood, lemons and sandalwood. Made me want to barf.

Amelia and I had come across him in the 1930’s. He’d gone to Europe from the dust bowl as a Regular Human and returned a Vampire. Not the kind of person we like to see being turned into a Vampire. There were repercussions but Don, unfortunately, was spared and has spent the past 80 years spreading his slime across the world only make a poisoned snail like trail between Los Angeles and Las Vegas.

At various times over the years, he’d stalked me and tried to drag me into his nasty lair. The guy had no idea what he was dealing with. My husband Teddy and brother Max hunted him down and dropped him down a mine shaft where we stayed for over a year, only to be rescued by one of his pathetic little Vampire sluts. These are not Modern Vampires, but Vampire cockroaches of the lowest order. Vampire Trash. The idea of them makes my skin crawl. And even worse, he attracts Vampire Hunters – the kind who make no distinction between scum like Don and the rest of us. Damn it. I wish they’ll thrown a fire bomb down that well when they had the chance.

In the meantime, Amelia and I discussed what we’re going to do tonight. Maybe go to a few clubs. We’d put on our little black dresses and heels and have some grown-up fun.

I suggested cocktails but Amelia just smiled and said “Why not just go straight for the jugular.”

And perhaps, as long as we’re solving all the problems of the world, we’ll do a little Vampire hunting of our own. Watch out Don, if Amelia and I get our way this might be your last night in Vegas.

Now that sounds like a fun night out.

Wishing you all fun, no matter what you’re doing or who you’re doing it with.

I’ll keep you updated on what happens with Don the cockroach later tonight or tomorrow.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

beware