Short Story Sunday: Fairies


“Why do they call them fairy tales? I don’t see any romance around here. What a dead zone,” said the green winged fairy Daisy. “Fairy guys are clueless. Totally clueless.”

“All they want is sex, and then they fly off to who knows where,” said the yellow winged fairy Iris.

Andy listened as the group of angry female fairies, nodding his head to show his empathy for their situation.

“It is all the fault of that Berrie fool,” said the pink winged fairy Belinda.

“Berry? Like the fruit?” asked Andrew.

“NOOOOOO,” screeched Belinda. “That fucking idiot who wrote about that fucking idiot Peter Pan.”

“Fucking idiots,” yelled all of the fairies.

“Ladies, ladies, watch your language,” said Andy.

“Since then all of the fairy guys think they’re fucking Peter Pan,” said Daisy.

“Fucking Peter Pan,” yelled all of the fairies.

“And we don’t want to be stinking Wendys or stinking Tinker Bells,” yelled Belinda.

“Stinking Wendy and Tinker Bell,” yelled all of the fairies.

“Ladies,” said Andy. “The fairy men can’t ALL be like that.”

The fairies, all ten of them, scowled and crossed their little arms.

“Love and romance isn’t always so easy,” said Andy.

“Of course it is,” said a tiny white winged fairy. “You’re a Vampire. That is synonymous with sexy male romance.”

“You’ve been reading too many books and seeing too many weird movies. Do you see any women here? I haven’t been in love since… not for a long time.”

“Shawna,” the fairies all said in a hushed whisper.

“Yes, not since Shawna.”

“Tell us how you met again. Tell us again,” cried the fairies.

“We met on a beach in Patagonia. She was on an archeological dig. I was trying traveling and trying to find myself. We danced on the beach, under the moonlight. We fell in love. She was fifty two. I was a hundred and sixty two but I didn’t think the age difference would matter.”

“You look like you’re thirty,” said Daisy.

“I know. That can be a problem. I thought it was true love. Then she hesitated. Eventually she left me for a guy she could grow old with. She didn’t want to grow old with me because I don’t grow old. I loved her then, and I will love her always. You can’t imagine how much I miss her.”

“Awwwwww poor Andy,” said all of the fairies in a hushed tone, as they wiped their tiny tears from their tiny eyes.

“Since then I have had lovers, and friends, and stalkers, but nobody has touched my heart like Shawna.”

“You need to call her. Send her a message,” said Belinda.

“Text her. Tell her you love her,” said Daisy.

“Tell her you still love her,” said all of the fairies at once.

Andy gave them a sad smile, sat down at his piano and sang sad love songs. After My Funny Valentine, a group of male fairies came into the room and sat next to the female fairies. The snuggled and listened to Andy’s beautiful voice. They saw a cold tear run down his face, but none of them said a thing.

He played for two hours, until the clock struck midnight, and he heard a voice.

“Andy, you didn’t answer. The door was unlocked so I came in.”

He turned. “Shawna.”

“Andy,” she said.

“What are you doing here?”

“You texted me.”

Andy glanced up at the fairies. Belinda winked at him. She was holding his phone.

“Shawna, how did you get here so fast?”

“I live in Berkeley. I moved up from Los Angeles when… it didn’t work out and I was offered a teaching position at Cal. He left me for another woman. She was younger and… it doesn’t matter. My son is up here and so it made sense. It was a great opportunity. You know, one last big thing before I retire.”

Then her eyes moved to the top of the bookshelf. “Are those fairies?”

“Yes,” said Andy, “and it is time for them to leave.”

And with that the fairies flew out the window and closed it behind them.

He turned up the heat and offered her a glass of wine.

“We need to talk,” said Shawna.

“No, not right now. Not right now. Tonight we need to love,” Andy said, as he put his arms around her. Then he kissed her, just as he kissed her that first time under the light of the Patagonian moon.

And the fairies danced about the garden, thinking up what fun and games they’d have on this summer.

~ End


Tangled Tales


For more about how Andy met Shawna click here.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman



A Short Romance (about a long romance)

A Short Romance (about a long romance)

Lady Sarah put down her cup of tea and pondered the meaning of her life. According to her father she shouldn’t be doing this. First of all she shouldn’t be using her brain (according to her father) and second (according to her father) her life had no meaning until she became a wife. That would be a wife to a man of her father’s choosing.

The first time she was engaged it was to George. They’d grown up together. The prospect of being George’s wife was exciting. They’d been friends forever. But he grew distant and then one day went away and came back a week later with a beautiful wife and a tiny newborn baby. The baby had been named Sarah.

The second man she had been engaged to was Percy. He was quite wealthy, good looking and said “Sarah, dear Sarah, I am enchanted by you.” They spent long hours walking and talking about all sorts of things that made Sarah use her brain. And when he kissed her (her father did not know) she wanted to use the rest of her body too. Unfortunately a month before the wedding Percy fell from a horse and was immediately killed.

Sarah thought she would die that day. She went into mourning and thought she’d never see the sunshine again.

Six months later Sarah’s father, against her wishes, her father arranged for her to be married to Jonathan, a young wealthy titled widow. His beautiful, rich and pregnant wife had thrown herself from a bridge one cold winter morning and sank down under the ice. It was horrible. But Sarah came to realize that it was a fate better than living with the abusive Jonathan. He already hinted at how Sarah had to change and conform to meet his standards. He told others how he would mould her and whip her into shape. The first time he slapped her and called her weak she said nothing. The second time she called off the engagement, telling her father that she’d rather jump off a bridge than marry a monster.

Now, two years later, she was engaged again. She remembered the night that awkward Sebastian was introduced to her. He was nice enough to look at – more than nice. But he was quiet, not the usual loud boisterous kind of man her father would bring around.

One day she’d seen Sebastian in the stable after a rain storm removing his wet clothing. Now at night she closed her eyes and imagined him in her bedroom, without the wet clothing and without the awkwardness.

One day Sarah was having afternoon tea with Sebastian – it was one of those rare times when they were alone. She looked at the young, rich, handsome, quiet man that she was going to marry and realized she hardly knew him.

“Have you always been so quiet?” She knew it was rude and improper but she had to ask.

“I’m, uh, not always so quiet dear Sarah. It seems as if this engagement was thrust upon us, this union, this contract… I have become so very fond of you. I will love you. I promise you that I will. I will adore you. You are everything I dreamed of. The fact that you ask me about my quiet nature shows you have an active mind. I like that. I’m not always so quiet. I promise you.”

I will love you. It was an odd thing to say. It was true, maybe. But he didn’t love her yet. He hardly knew her. She hardly knew him.

Sarah finished her tea, put on her coat and went out for a walk. She wished she was in the city right now. It would have been nice to see people.

In the morning fog she was a figure on the path. It was Sebastian. She ran to him and then took his face in her hands and kissed him.

He put his arms around her and kissed her again and again and again.

“We need to make it work. We’ll be happy. We won’t be strangers who live together for years. We will be friends and partners. You will be my equal. Our love will be true and strong,” he said to Sarah.

She looked into his eyes and wondered, “Who is this man?”

Sebastian put his forehead against Sarah’s and said, “I want to marry you Sarah. I see your independence, I see your spirit and your passion. Our parents think this is a good match. They see our union as good business. They also have given up on our prospects of marriage. I see this as a union of souls and of like minds. Sarah, marry me. Let me grow to love you with a passion that will last for a thousand years.”

They kissed again, and then he said, “But, I have a secret that even my family doesn’t know. Hear me out and if you don’t want to marry me feel free to leave and I will be gone from your life forever.”

Sarah listened and pondered the weirdness and then the reality of the secret. It could have been worse. So she decided at age 26 that her prospects were zero. She didn’t want to be a pathetic old maid to be pitied by others. She didn’t want to be married to a pompous ass or a man who didn’t understand her mind. It would mean a life of adventure and passion and risks. She was willing to do that. What did she have to lose?


Thinking back on those days Sarah had to smile. She was planning a special anniversary dinner. She and Sebastian would be celebrating their 200th wedding anniversary. What a special time November 1814 was for them! For you see, Sebastian was a Vampire. But I’m sure you’d already guessed that.

And yes, they did live happily ever after.


~ End


First published in 2014.

I’m on the road right now but will be back soon with exciting new REAL LIFE adventures about life, traveling with adult children, art, beauty, parenting, history, love, vampires, and whatever else I happen to experience or observe. xoxo

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman



Short Story Sunday: Star Crossed Wars

May the fourth be with you.

red heart

Star Crossed Wars

Undying lust was the feeling that always came up first when he looked at the woman next to him. She was dressed in old jeans and a black tee shirt, cleaning her weapons with the radio turned up too loud. It was a late night rebroadcast of Science Friday. She was such a surprise.

He walked up to her and stood close, as he always did when he wanted her. Later as they lay back on the bed she opened an eye and gave him a half smile.

“Remember when we saw Star Wars the first time, in the theater.”

“It was the most amazing movie we’d ever seen,” he answered and kissed her. His mouth went to her neck where he brushed his fangs across her cool skin.

“I was always bothered by that Vampire creature in the bar,” she told him.

He ran his hands through her hair and kissed her again. “Be glad they don’t show us as we are, alive and beautiful and so cold. Your skin is so cold. I want you.”

She thought about their relationship in the form of movies they’d seen. Star Wars. Casablanca. Rebecca. Made of Honor. Paranormal. It was a stupid random list that popped into her head that made no sense. Then again when it came to Max nothing made sense anymore.

Vampires are known for their control but when it came to Max there was no control. Mehitabel tried but it always ended up being the wrong thing in the long run.

She dared not ask him why his heart was the only part of his body that couldn’t be hers. She put her hands on his face and turned his eyes towards hers. “I…”

“Yes?” He gave her that smile of him that melted her.

“I want you.” She couldn’t say the other word that started with an L.

She lost herself to him again, body and soul, never knowing how long this would last. Maybe another year, maybe another hundred. Falling asleep in his arms her dreams turned to stars and space ships and adventures that were yet to come.



Tangled Tales

Tangled Tales


 ~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

Record time – written in 15 minutes and half a cup of coffee! Time for a warm up!

Click here for more short stories.

Letter from a Zombie – love never dies or rots way.

Valentine’s Day is a time for letters, even unexpected stories of love that totally come out of the blue.

I received a letter today, an old fashioned letter in an envelope with a stamp, from my friend Melissa. Oh my goodness. I have been so worried about her.

A little back story: About a year ago my friends Mike and Melissa were driving across the Mojave desert on a business trip. They had a flat tire and unfortunately the only help they received was from Zombies. (see links below for their back story)

We’ve kept in touch. Figuratively, not literally (even I don’t like to touch Zombies.)

Dear Juliette,

We are in the western mountains of North Carolina.

The cabin (safe house) we’re staying in is modern and spacious with a lot of privacy being that it is about 20 miles off the main road.

Mike raided the body farm at the university and acquired fresh human brains for Valentine’s Day. We’ll have those with a nice bottle of California wine and see where the night takes us, provided no body parts fall off of either one of us.

Our supply of the tonic you made for us is low. I dare not ask you send more but if you know any Vampires in the area who might be willing to trade for whatever we have to offer. We’re willing to work with barter. Mike can fix any computer. Neither one of us sleep anymore so we can work all night. Granted we’re a little slow these days but we’re hard workers. Once we get more tonic we’ll be able to speed up. We’re also experts in agricultural law and crop management, not to mention agra business. I also train dogs.

I have to admit that I always found the prospect of becoming a Vampire thrilling and romantic. Unfortuantely being a Zombie doesn’t hold the same romance. It is awful. The cravings for brains and flesh is unspeakable and almost uncontrollable. The worst part though is that we’re rotting like dead things. We’re our own body farm. We make jokes because we both like to garden. That is horrible but humor is the only way we’ve been able to manage.

Mike and I were friends before this happened. We worked together, had lunch and drinks after work with friends and even went on a few business trips together. We spoke before the state senate together. We were just friends with a lot of professional respect. I never thought of him as anything romantic.

Now, oh Juliette, now that everything has gone right to Hell and is so screwed up, I think I’m in love with him. I am in love with him. I’m in love with every rotting cell in his putrid body.

Why now? Why couldn’t I have seen his humor, the sparkle in his eyes, they way he used to dance at parties. All the single women wanted to be with him. But I never saw that until now. And now we’re Zombies.

I’m so afraid they’ll find us and bring us back to Area Z out in the desert. We’ll be put in that camp with hundreds of mindless quarantined Zombies. We’ll die alone. We’ll be looked upon as freaks.

So what if we’re technically dead? We’re still alive in our hearts, even if our hearts don’t beat.

Vampires live for centuries but Zombies only have so much time, like a pound of hamburger left out in the summer sun to rot.

The only thing that helps is the tonic, but I dare not tell a soul. It would put your people in danger and I could never do that. If I ever get over this Zombie thing I swear I will pay you back in triplicate for all your help.

I can hear Mike shuffling to the window in the loft to look out at the snow. The storm is bad tonight. Luckily we have enough fuel to keep us in light and food in the freezer and shed (don’t ask.)

I know he is the one. I know it in my heart of hearts that no longer beats. I know it every time he moans and shuffles towards me. I know it when he tries to look presentable and human. He does it just for me. He makes me laugh so I won’t cry. He stuffs the fingers of my gloves where I no longer have my own fingers. He tells me I’m still beautiful.

Keep in touch. I know I made it sound bad, but we’re getting used to this Zombie thing. Mike and I will be ok as long as we have each other.

Thank you for helping us escape and hide. I never thought I’d say this to a Vampire, but thank you for keeping us alive.

I miss you.

Gratefully your friend,


vm rose

I sat for a while trying not to tear up, then I called someone I knew, a shadow creeping Vampire who lives about 100 miles from where Mike and Melissa are. He owes me favors big time. Now I’m cashing in. Sure I’ll help a Zombie out and if they get better I might even help them become Vampires. You never know.

But it just goes to show that even when your world is falling apart, along with your body, and nothing seems real anymore, love will still hold strong and true.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

vm blonde from behind

Links to the back story:

  1. Lunch Date With A Zombie:
  2. The Art of Writing Love Letters is Alive and Well, Even for Zombies and Ghosts:
  3. And Speaking of Zombies…: