Why you’re morbidly (and passionately) attracted to Vampires

What is the fascination with Vampires?

Disclaimer: I used the word MORBID in the post title because it sounded creepy and fun. No other reason.

Warnings: If you despise the idea of Vampires, people who like the idea of Vampires, Werewolves and all sorts of paranormal, supernatural, things that go bump in the night and flapping bats, ghosts, elves and cocktails then you might want to go read something else, like the stock reports or the back of your laundry detergent box.

People like to be scared

grossoutRemember when you were a kid sitting around the campfire listening to the stories about the man with the golden arm or the guy with the hook arm or random ghost stories? Then you graduated to your first Stephen King novel and now you can’t look at a clown without wanting to scream? And we love watching those Paranormal Activity Movies even though they are so stupid that we’re laughing at the same time we’re jumping out of our skin scared. A cracked closet door at night contains more than just party dresses… a footstep at night is more than just the cat padding up the stairs…it is the unknown thing that lurks in the deepest darkest corners of our imaginations…it is fear and we love it.

And face it, Vampires can be pretty scary. They can immobilize you with their minds, seduce you, suck your blood and kill you. And they can turn you into a Vampire if they so desire. They’re called undead, like a ghost with a body (not really but that is the mythology.) Plus bad Vampires are really really really hard to kill.

Now, when you’re scared you either become a quivering mass of emotional jelly, or you get an intense adrenaline rush. So being scared turns from something bad into something really fun.

So your assignment for tonight is to get a flashlight, a blanket, turn off the lights, put the blanket over your head, turn on the flashlight and read Poe’s “The Tell Tale Heart”. Now THAT will creep you out.

Plus without the sense of fear the squirrels would have eaten humans a long time ago. OK, I’m sure the badgers, wolves and bears would have helped out a little, but you know what I mean.

Vampires are Forbidden

If you’re a Regular Human your mom and dad won’t want you to be dating a Vampire. They’re weird, cold and suck your blood. They aren’t like you. But you like the Vampire anyway and think your parents are dorks.  I think that explains the forbidden part of this post.

You like the idea of Power

ignoranceVampires, while hidden, are powerful. They can be immoral, putting aside their souls or thought of others. But they are purposeful and smart. They move in the shadows using seduction (that sex thing again) and power to get what they desire. They are hunters, one of the few beings that are on top of the food chain, above humans. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be there. I love my veggies too but…you have to admit there is nothing like getting your fangs into someone and feeling that surge of energy. What a rush. A rush that no drug can duplicate.


No physical aging, more or less. Who wouldn’t like that? On the other hand there are things one might miss out on, like knee replacements…I doubt if there is any of that anyone would miss out on. Plus the almost complete lack of illness, not worrying about elderly parents, the ability to do things over again and again and again…and boredom that could last for centuries if you don’t play your cards right.

Man’s Triumph Over Evil

carrieOh just blame it on the Vampire. Go ahead.

My opinion on this one is that humans must overcome their own evil and look at themselves, not with rose-colored glasses and not with fear. They must put aside their political, religious and cultural biases and stand against evil. When one stands against evil one must not fear it but take it by the neck and strangle it out.

OK to translate that bit of writing I just penned: Evil is violence and hate for the purpose of control and spreading ignorance. Evil hides behind a false mask of religion, power and goodness – so listen carefully when you hear the voice of evil it sounds like the song of an angel. Evil will also tell lies to turn you against good. Pickup any history book and you’ll find hundreds, even thousands of examples. To translate again – don’t believe everything you hear. Being a skeptic could one day save your life. Just read “The Hunchback of Notre Dame.” You’ll know what I’m talking about.

In order to explain away evil people, humans have used creatures such as Vampires, Werewolves and Ghosts as metaphors for such bad behavior.

A long time ago, way before CSI, way before Jack the Ripper, before Dracula and before The Bridges of Madison County (sorry, I had to get that in there HA HA HA), humans had a difficult time explaining extreme horrible events such as serial killers. No human could cause such violence. No human could kill/torture/rape in the middle of the night unless…unless it wasn’t human. It couldn’t be human. Well, wake up and smell the warm mead, it wasn’t a Werewolf, back in 835 AD it was Weird Uncle Bill who carved weird little wooden rats and lived with his mom in her mud hut, that is until he killed her and started dressing in her clothes. In 1343 it was charming handsome Sir Albert who was luring all of those woman away to the swamp where he’d do horrible things to them. Or in 1890 the beloved Rev. Donald Green posed as a good man of God, when in truth he was a Godless man, using the local river banks as a dump for the tortured bodies of lost souls who’d come through his soup kitchen.

But wouldn’t it be easier to believe it was a blood sucking creature of the night or a man turned into a wolf who did all the killing?

And just like serial killers fascinate us, we’re fascinated with all inhuman creatures that act in the place of bad humans.

On the other hand, one never knows if it could have been a rogue Vampire or Werewolf. We just don’t know. Well, some of us know…

My husband has always been fascinated with serial killers (and he finds them horrible.) He even has some new theories on the Zodiac. Then again, we live in Northern California a place that seems to be the epicenter of weird killers. Yuck.

Of course a small circle of Vampires, who just happened to be in London in the 1880’s know exactly who Jack the Ripper was.

Yes, Vampires are dangerous to please be cautious. Vampires will suck out your blood. Vampires will lie to you. Vampires will trick you. Vampires will break your heart. Vampires can, if provoked, suck out your soul and rip your throat out. Vampires are not to be taken lightly. And despite what you’ve learned from my blog there are some evil Vampires out there that you don’t want to mess with.

Vampires are Fun!

As you can see by my posts that Vampires usually have more fun than a bathtub full of otters. It doesn’t take much to amuse a Vampire (or piss us off, but we’ve got that under control, at least most of us)

The Romance of Vampires

romanceDrum roll please. Or should it be violins? This is the number one reason why people currently like Vampires. And don’t we all need a little romance in our lives.

Every other post on this blog has to do with romance. The others involve parenting (Vampire teens), poetry and cats. The most popular posts on this Vampire blog are about writing love letters. If you look at most (not all) but most modern Vampire books it is all about dark forbidden romance.

Blame that on Braham Stoker when he introduced Dracula to the general public but since then writers have been creating more sexy Vampires than I could have ever imagined. And they’re right. I can’t even start to list all of the authors (so I won’t right now).

Vampires do the most personal thing someone could ever do – they drink your blood. Your life force that comes from your warm and beating heart. Vampires NEED you in order to survive. It is that intimate physical connection, in the shadows, the forbidden desire, the kiss of cool lips on your neck, the whisper of a voice so young, yet so old… a voice that belongs to a creature who knows all of your hopes and fears…

If fall in love with a Vampire the choices are difficult. Do you go with him forever into the dark, or do you live forever with a broken heart and the knowledge of another world that so few humans ever experience? For the kiss of a Vampire is something no mortal ever forgets.

Imagine the most intense eyes looking into yours. The cool kiss, hot with passion. Every desire, every want, every need will be fulfilled by this creature of the night, a mystery, an unfulfilled promise waiting to be awakened, it is all yours. You feel the kiss on your neck followed by a scrape of fangs, then those fangs sink into your warm flesh, you want to pull away, but you can’t, you want to stay, you want to be consumed with the intense physical desires and the flood of emotions – fear, lust, desire, want, need, love. And that my dear is what happens when you meet up close and personal with a Vampire.

It is also that romance that lasts not for years, but for centuries.

Vampire Love Poem

I was a spirit

In white silk with pink roses

Bustle in back

You in black tails

Took my breath away

And a century later

When you realized

That I loved you

I could exhale.


red heart

And face it girls – Vampire guys are HOT.  They just are. I don’t even need to explain. Whew. Fan me off right now.

A Short List of Vampire Posts for Reference on Romance:

There are more posts on the subject…feel free to search around.


So to wrap things up…

Everyone should have fun, and who better to have fun with than a Vampire. Take my word for it. 

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman.

The Tiger and Vampire Maman

The Tiger and Vampire Maman

This is not a scientific study. Keep in mind the POV (point of view) of this odd little semi-popular blog. Chime in if you want. There are many myths, many truths, many theories about Vampire and their cohorts. I mean, really, would you come HERE for a real scientific study? Really? But please feel free to share your stories and your reason for being fascinated with Vampires. Remarks from haters and priggishly toned know-it-alls will be promptly removed (let’s keep this fun folks)

Good Friends and Men in Dark Suits…

You know those times when a friend is talking to you over a glass of wine after work and all you can do is look at his wrist for the perfect vein.

I shouldn’t go out hungry.

I occasionally meet with a group of friends a few times a month, usually when the husband and kids are busy. Regular Human friends. Sometimes more than friends (why I’m looking for veins).

Anyway, I’m sitting with my friend Tray waiting for the rest of the group when he says, “the weirdest thing happened to me today. I was asked if I knew anything about Vampires.”

“What?” I looked up from his arm. “Who asked you that?”

“They said they were investigating the disappearance of Mike and Melissa.”

Mike and Melissa were friends of ours. They still are friends. Anyway, they’ve vanished off the face of the Earth, or so it seemed, one night when their car broke down on an isolated highway.  Unknow to everyone else…our friends  turned into Zombies and with help from another friend (me) avoided being captured and returned back to Area Z. But Tray didn’t have a hint of any of that.

“Why’d they ask you about Vampires?” I knew Tray didn’t have the answer but I asked anyway.

“I don’t know. They said they believed I might know people who walked more on the dark side, alternative life style.”

“You’re the most un-goth guy I know.”

“I know. It was weird.”

“Do you have beautiful women coming to your room at night biting your neck?”

“I wish.” He laughed and almost blushed.

I looked at his neck. Nice veins that I knew well. Trey was such a sweetheart too. A+ too – my favorite.

Anyway he looked up and smiled at someone who just showed up and shook hands. I turned around and there was my brother Val. I didn’t know he knew these friends of mine. Then Mattie and Lilly showed up and Jason. All professionals in their mid 30’s, early 40’s.

I stood up and gave friendly hugs and kissed my brother.

“Where do you two know each other?” They asked.

“We’re siblings.” Val said putting his arm around my shoulder. They all saw the resemblance, brown hair, hazel eyes, cute noses, pale skin and our dazzling smiles with those cute pointed eye teeth. Yes indeed.

By then I was ready to take Tray for a walk, my stomach was about to jump out and eat me.

But I wanted to know more about those men in suits.

They’d all been visited by them. Tray at his job with the Justice department, Mattie at her law firm, Lilly in her design studio and Jason in his hair salon. Then they all asked if Val and I had met the men in suits.

“Sure,” said Val “but they’re way off course. Vampires? Really? They’re looking for either a cult or some sort of code word. We’re all professionals who happen to be hip, smart and interesting. We’re open for new ideas and the avant garde.”

“Don’t take these guys lightly. They know more about you than you think. They aren’t too far off from a Twilight episode. I’m serious.” And I was serious. I’m glad my friends were smart enough to listen, not to mention that I planted the seed in their brains to take it seriously. People don’t realize that Vampire friends really do look out for their safety.

We talked more, but I kept looking at Tray. Then I noticed Val talking close to Lilly, in a friendly way that was more intimate. Her blue eyes gazed into his as he brushed a strand of bottle blonde hair behind her ear.

The sun went down and we talked for a few hours, speculating on the existence of Vampires and other such nonsense. Val and Lilly eventually left, no doubt to go back to her house.

Tray walked me to my car and asked me how Teddy and the kids were doing. I asked him how he was doing after his breakup with his girlfriend. He was doing ok but we talked some more. I know he’d find someone new and special and wonderful, but I didn’t think he believed that. At least not yet.

Then we talked about how much we missed Mike and Melissa. Maybe one day I could tell him the truth, but that was still a long way off.

At that point I didn’t have the heart to sink my teeth into any part of him. Sometimes we just need to be friends, even if we are Vampires.

And all the way home I watched my rear mirror for a car containing men in suits. The fun never ends.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

For those who missed it the first time around: A Lunch Date With Zombies (featuring Mike, Melissa and Cody) https://vampiremaman.com/2012/09/21/a-lunch-date-with-zombies/