The art of ease dropping

Ever had one of those evenings when you just wanted to relax but nobody would let you? But then it doesn’t matter because the commotion just too fun to pass up.

My brother Max dropped by the other evening. He’d spent the past few nights on some rough and disturbing jobs. There were scenes that stuck in his head even too disturbing for a seasoned hunter like him to describe.

On the way home from a somewhat nasty and gruesome job involving a couple of freakish rogue Vampires, his partners had called to say they’d found the location of a ruthless nest of Vampire Hunters. Another rescue and inhalation was in order. It was exhilarating and exhausting both physically and emotionally.

After finalizing things with his partners Jayne and Mehitabel he made his way to my house. That would be my brother Max, ultra Vampire macho man. Fearless, tough and sexy (not sexy to me, I’m his sister, sheesh.)

He arrived a little on edge. I mixed him a cocktail while my husband Teddy (Max’s BFF) and I listened to Max’s story. It was horrifying and gruesome to say the least, but of course we couldn’t stop listening.

Then suddenly there was a crashing sound and screams. Max reached for a weapon in his belt. Teddy and I didn’t flinch.

“Teenage girls,” I said. “Five of them are upstairs. Sorry I didn’t tell you we’re having a slumber party.”

I looked down at the gun.

“If you’re going to stay the night,” I said to my brother, “you’re going to have put that thing in the safe. We have kids in the house.”

“Do you mind if Jayne and Mehitabel stop by here tonight?” Max asked knowing the answer would always be yes. Jayne and Mehitabel were his partners – hunters and enforcement like my brother. These were women to be admired and Vampires to be feared. Plus Jayne was always funny and always makes me laugh out loud.

Of course we didn’t mind. Our house often resembles Grand Central Station.

While my poor tired brother was in the shower I walked by my daughter’s room. The conversations in there are always interesting.

“Boys never take showers. They say “I’m just going to take another one tomorrow.” That is like saying I’m going to take a dump and not wipe because I’m just going to take another one tomorrow.”

There was another comment about the fact that boys think that spraying Ax on anything will make any smell go away.

Jayne and Mehitabel arrived covered in dirt and sweat and blood and who knows what. I sent them to clean up.

The adults were in the family too and kitchen. Clara (age 14) and friends (Allie, Krystal, Veronica and Jackie) were upstairs in her room. My 17-year-old Garrett and his friends Randy and Jake were on the back deck.

I cracked the kitchen window and could hear Garrett and his friends talking.

Ethan already got a letter from Princeton. UC Santa Barbara told Keera that they want her. 

She is so freaking talented, even for a Werewolf. I mean, like they’re usually not artistic.

She is so hot. I wish she was a Vampire. Either way I think I’m getting into Santa Barbara. I hope I do.

As I went to get more wine glasses I could hear Max and Mehitabel in the dining room. I stood dead still so I could hear what they were saying. There is a history between the two and of course I HAD to listen in. Come on, admit it, you would have done the same if it was your brother (or anyone else for that matter.)

I heard Max’s voice, lower and slightly more husky and urgent than his usual tone.

 You were in love with me. I know you were.

She answered back. I killed three rogue Vampires tonight. Then we had to deal with the Vampire Hunters who almost did the same thing to us. I can’t stop shaking Max. This isn’t about you. Everything isn’t about you.

I stepped away and went back to the family room with glasses and an opened bottle of wine (a nice Coastal Zin.) I heard Teddy and Jayne talking.

Like a hedge? They’ll grow like that?

Sure. Cherries, pears, apples. You can train the trees to grown flat on a trellis. 

So many slices of life just walking around my own home. So many stories in so few words. So much of the universe all right here under my own roof.

I’m always listening in no matter where I am. Listen and you’ll hear all the stories of universe – even if it might be out of context, but it is always interesting.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman