Wrong Number

This is a story from 2014. On this cold rainy night I thought it was worth telling again.

This isn’t a tall tale or something from the mysterious paranormal or gothic side of life.

It is just a story of something sort of sad.

It isn’t even my story. It is the story of someone who is alone. We think this person is alone. We don’t know for sure. It is a mystery.

It is a story of missed connections.

I didn’t make this up.

Smart phones don’t always reflect the situation of the people who are calling them. When we get a new phone number more likely than not somebody else had that number before we did. Or our number is close to another more popular number. When I first go my cell phone number about 12 years ago I kept getting calls from people speaking Spanish and Chinese. I got calls for a bakery. I got calls for a tire store.

My daughter has been getting calls from a local mental hospital. They are looking for a man named Thomas. He needs to pick up a patient who is only called by a number. No name. Just a number. This has been going on for two weeks.

If we were in a movie or a novel Clara, Garrett her 17-year-old brother and their friend Randy would go to the mental hospital and get the mysterious patient only known by a number. Then they’d have a strange and wild adventure and it would all wrap up after a lot of violence and car chases. But this isn’t a movie or a book.

Unfortunately the mystery isn’t unfolding. It is just a sad situation. Somebody is at a mental hospital for teens and adults. Someone is alone. So alone. They need a ride and the only number the hospital has is the wrong number which belongs to the phone of a 14-year-old girl. Nobody seems interested in finding the correct number or perhaps a different contact. Isn’t anyone talking to the patient only known by a number? Clara has spoken to people at the hospital explaining the situation but she keeps getting calls for asking for the mysterious Thomas.

This mysterious phone number (with the prefix of 666) also receives calls for a young woman I’ll call M. These are also sad and weird. M missed a court date. The parole officer is pissed off to no end. M deals drugs.  M owes everyone money. M is a go between for drug deals. M has an ex-boyfriend who is looking for her. M is a train wreck. M gets a lot of phone calls. I’ve heard these phone messages too. It is not a life I’d want to be part of or want my children to be part of. I don’t even want M to be part of it. It is an unfortunate life full of bad choices that nobody should be part of.

It is strange and sad that by accident we have seen into sad lives of people we will never meet. We don’t know anyone like M. We don’t know who Thomas is. We don’t know who the person is who needs to be picked up. We never will know. Clara has told the callers that they have called the wrong number. That is all she can do.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

Ask Juliette: Difficult Questions about Family and Relationships

Ask Juliette (Dear Juliette – Ask A Vampire) is a regular Thursday feature here at vampiremaman.com

Real answers for real readers (you think I make this crap up?)
Ask Juliette

Q: My husband and I have been fighting with my sister-in-law for four years since their father died, over simple estate matters that could have been easily resolved if everyone had worked together. What is it about death that turns ordinary people into monsters and turns siblings against each other?

A. There are a lot of reasons people act nasty after someone dies, and none of them are good reasons. Old resentments live on long after death.

Sometimes siblings feel entitled. They feel as though they deserve more than the other siblings for various reasons (or no reason.) Or sometimes somebody else feels that because they are more “successful” or “educated” they are entitled to be in charge. And some people are just nasty to begin with.

It is incredibly sad how someone can let their own ego get in the way, ruin the memory of a loved one, and tear their own family apart.

My advice has always been for each person to take a few small things they want and have a third-party auction everything else off.

This is a cautionary tale for everyone to make sure they have a will and a family trust so their heirs won’t be fighting over who gets what. That includes making of list of heirlooms and who gets what (post it notes don’t cut it – it has to be a formal list.)

Or I could give you a typical Vampire answer and say “Stab em in the neck.”

 

 

Q: A guy I like has a good job, his own place, cleans up after himself, is funny, cute and sexy. So what’s the problem? He writes fiction. I’ve read his work and he is really good but he has only had a few short stories published. Is this normal or should I write him off as a out of touch dreamer.

A: Maybe he needs to write you off as out of touch. People write for a lot of reasons. You should consider yourself lucky to be with a creative guy. Life will never be boring, of course unless he gets bored with you.

Q: I’m a successful widowed middle-aged guy with two sons in college. My girlfriend is successful, middle-aged widow with a daughter in college. I was drawn to her for her sense of humor and intelligence. My son’s love her and talk with her for hours. I don’t think I’ve ever had more fun with anyone in my life. I was recently looking for some ibuprofen at her home and found prescription antidepressants in her medicine cabinet. When I confronted her about it she said it was no big deal. She said it is just a minor thing, like a chemical imbalance. She said she’d been depressed for no reason since her teens, and got weepy about every little thing. The drugs stopped it and made her feel “normal” again. She said she could function without the drugs but didn’t like having to fight with the depression coming on at any given moment. Should I be concerned about mental health issues down the road. I love her but I don’t want to be stuck with someone ready to go off the deep end.

A: Your girlfriend is fine. She saw a problem. She got help. Don’t worry about it. Be happy she recognized her depression and got help. You said she is a success and your kids love her. Wow, I mean, how wonderful is that? Now call her up and tell her how much you love her.

 

Q. Why do Vampires always wear black.

A. We don’t always wear black. OK, we do a lot, but everyone wears black (at least those of us who are hip and with it.)

 

Q: How do I get rid of feelings of guilt. I think I hurt someone who overheard me saying something out of context. It wasn’t about him, but he might have thought it was. Do I say something?

A: I don’t know. This is one of those damned if you do, damned if you don’t moments. Either way it could heat up, back fire, blow up, get uncomfortable, or just make you want to crawl into a hole. Life can be a bitch. Of course if you’re a Vampire you just move on. If you’re a regular person you suffer. Eventually you might want to explain it, but choose your words carefully. Sorry I couldn’t help you more with that one.

Q: Every time I’m with my girlfriend I feel like she has eaten my brain. Our sex life is great and my friends all like her and tell me she is the one, but she is so demanding. She wants to spend every night with me, but we always have to be doing something. She never wants to just hang out. Some nights, after a long day at work I just want to watch TV or play on the computer. I don’t always feel like entertaining someone. It would be nice if she could just sit with me and do nothing. I’m going to go broke financially and emotionally.

A. She obviously isn’t the one for you. She sounds needy and high maintenance. Nobody needs that.

We all need our own space and our down time. If she can’t respect that then it just isn’t going to work. Tell her you need your space. If she refuses to understand and says stupid things like, “I guess you don’t love me,” then dump her. Seriously, you need someone who isn’t so needy.

Vampire Teen

Well folks, that is all for this week. Now that I’m emotionally exhausted from answering all of these questions I’m going to take my pup out for a walk.

Ask Juliette is a regular Thursday feature here at Vampiremaman.com

If you have questions about anything from Alligators to Zombies just ask and I’ll try to answer.

Send your questions to juliettevampiremom@gmail dot com

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Even Vampires Get The Blues

Family lore said he left the battle fields of the war between the states and ran California to seek his fortune. There he died in a mine explosion. But he really went to Patagonia where he met a strange man with the voice of an angel. From there he met a man with the voice of an angel who hired him to go to London to hunt Vampires. And that is exactly what he did before he was murdered by a whore who said she did it for love. His niece ended up with all the gold and didn’t tell anyone.

 

I have the house to myself today and I was trying to pound out a blog post when my brother Andrew staggered down the stairs. Not quite alone. Andy had bad days, weeks, months… He tries to get in a good place by not spending too much time alone.

I give him coffee. He sits across the table from me. I can tell he is feeling numb and helpless. This extraordinarily gifted being feels this way for no reason – it just comes on like a wave, or so he describes it.

“I’d take drugs for this if I could but they don’t work for us,” he told me.

“I know sweetie,” I told my older brother. All four of my brothers are older. Andy is the second in line.

He is good at hiding it and dealing with it and avoiding it and trying not to acknowledge it. He doesn’t let it define him. But it is hard sometimes.

Andy had inspired a lot of my stories. My book Morning at the Vineyard is titled after a story about one of his misadventures. He is a musician, a lover and gentle soul and can party like no other. He is impulsive and the most thoughtful person I’ve ever met.

When he arrived I had a list of activities. No matter how painful it was he always tried and often the flurry of action and stimulus would knock him out of it. Odd how it works.

We chatted for a while over coffee. I poured a liberal amount of blood into his (remember we’re Vampires) and told him of some fun people we’d meet later tonight… yes, we’re Vampires remember.

But no matter what you are, if you’re a little bit of human you can get the blues. Werewolves get it bad. Regular Humans get it really bad. We just need to be sensitive and help those who have it. Just telling someone to snap out of it is like telling someone with a broken arm to snap out of it.

Andy asked about my blog post, the silly stuff I was writing about hidden stories. We takes about our family, my kids, or brother Aaron’s kids, our pets, music, his work and a lot of other things. He ran his hand through his long brown hair and closed his eyes then gave a slight shake of his head, as he does sometimes.

He takes my hand. “Thanks Jewels, I’m going to be fine.”

“I know,” I tell him. He’ll be fine as long as he remembers that it isn’t him. It is something else. He told me that a long time ago.

So anyway, we have a lot to do so we’ll get on with our fun.

Hope everyone has a good weekend full of love and understanding and good coffee.

 

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

Wrong Number

This isn’t a tall tale or something from the mysterious paranormal or gothic side of life.

It is just a story of something sort of sad.

It isn’t even my story. It is the story of someone who is alone. We think this person is alone. We don’t know for sure. It is a mystery.

It is a story of missed connections.

I didn’t make this up.

Smart phones don’t always reflect the situation of the people who are calling them. When we get a new phone number more likely than not somebody else had that number before we did. Or our number is close to another more popular number. When I first go my cell phone number about 12 years ago I kept getting calls from people speaking Spanish and Chinese. I got calls for a bakery. I got calls for a tire store.

My daughter has been getting calls from a local mental hospital. They are looking for a man named Thomas. He needs to pick up a patient who is only called by a number. No name. Just a number. This has been going on for two weeks.

If we were in a movie or a novel Clara, Garrett her 17-year-old brother and their friend Randy would go to the mental hospital and get the mysterious patient only known by a number. Then they’d have a strange and wild adventure and it would all wrap up after a lot of violence and car chases. But this isn’t a movie or a book.

Unfortunately the mystery isn’t unfolding. It is just a sad situation. Somebody is at a mental hospital for teens and adults. Someone is alone. So alone. They need a ride and the only number the hospital has is the wrong number which belongs to the phone of a 14-year-old girl. Nobody seems interested in finding the correct number or perhaps a different contact. Isn’t anyone talking to the patient only known by a number? Clara has spoken to people at the hospital explaining the situation but she keeps getting calls for asking for the mysterious Thomas.

This mysterious phone number (with the prefix of 666) also receives calls for a young woman I’ll call M. These are also sad and weird. M missed a court date. The parole officer is pissed off to no end. M deals drugs.  M owes everyone money. M is a go between for drug deals. M has an ex-boyfriend who is looking for her. M is a train wreck. M gets a lot of phone calls. I’ve heard these phone messages too. It is not a life I’d want to be part of or want my children to be part of. I don’t even want M to be part of it. It is an unfortunate life full of bad choices that nobody should be part of.

It is strange and sad that by accident we have seen into sad lives of people we will never meet. We don’t know anyone like M. We don’t know who Thomas is. We don’t know who the person is who needs to be picked up. We never will know. Clara has told the callers that they have called the wrong number. That is all she can do.

I was going to write about Vampires and darker subjects today, but these calls are pretty dark.

 

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman