A new meaning for “Junk” mail …or… OMG is that what I think it is?



My daughter (age 14) informed me that at least 600 of the 1,000 boys at her school have sent photos of their, um, “junk” to girls. This is unsolicited junk. I suppose that puts a new meaning on “junk mail.”

She said some kid would send her a message on any of the 35,000 social media sites she is on and after a “howz it going” and “do you understand the homework” a photo of a penis appears on the screen. Then the boys gets a “This conversation is over. Don’t ever contact me again” message.

Yuck. Girls don’t want to see THAT.  What were you thinking? Oh right. You weren’t thinking.

I was shocked. My husband said “They’re boys. They’re stupid.” My 17 year old son shrugged and said he knew all about this but he would never do anything like that. He said his girlfriend gets the same thing.

I’ve lectured my kids over and over about how it you put something out there it will always be out there. Do you want the admissions officer at Harvard seeing your “junk” or whatever? Do you want the HR Department of your dream job company to see it? Really?

Then the kids showed me how others pose in their sexy selfies. The one of the boy who pulls his shirt just over his stomach on the side made us all laugh. I’m talking 14-15 year old boys posing in their tightie-whities. It is just comic and totally stupid.

There is one girl at school who posted a photo of herself from the chin down but then tagged herself. Now if you look up her name on Google you see that naked photo. Smart move honey. EVERYBODY in school has seen that photo including your teachers. Didn’t your mama ever talk to you about things like this? Didn’t your friends talk to you?

My kids talk to me about everything and we’re extremely open about discussions about boys sending penis photos and other stupid things kids (and others do).

I suppose we can learn from the mistakes of others but when there are so many stupid things happening…

Over reacting to situations and putting blinders on kids only makes them go underground, so just keep the lines of communication open and be honest.

And kids, show the world you have a little self-respect. Please.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman


  1. Really? REALLY? yeah, I know… really. Sigh. I just don’t get the whole “selfy” thing anyway, junk or not. I keep saying, “At least have someone ELSE take your photo so we can’t see how narcissistic you are,” but they just keep taking their own photo in the mirror. Here’s one reply I heard, “He said, ‘I’m too embarrassed to have anyone else seeing me like that , so I take the photo myself.’ ” Umm… yeah, and then you post it. Doh!

    1. From duck face to nude photos it is just weird and sad. I’m surprised the boys don’t realize how sexist they are being sending random “parts photos” and expecting girls to respond by sending back a photo. Fortunately the girls I know just shut the guys down and tell them how stupid they are. The teachers talk to these kids about this sort of stuff but I doubt if their parents do. Sigh.

  2. it’s part of being a teen to make bad decisions but seems every decision today is made totally naked. having many 40 yr old friends back in the dating scene, it’s not just teens caught up in this trend! i’m not going to open any junk mail – thx for the heads up!

    1. Married adult friends of mine always say “I’m glad I’m not dating.” I can’t get over the way adults, even well known politicians in the public eye, have the urge to send unwanted “junk mail.” I just don’t get it. Scary and sad indeed. Thanks for your thoughts and pointing out that it isn’t just kids. Come on grown-ups, set a good example!

  3. Scary, the ideas some kids have nowadays without even thinking of any consequences – and the sentence (the net never forgets)… *sigh*

  4. I don’t get it. One reason I’m a photographer is so I’m behind the camera instead of in front of it. Running1 is right it’s not just teenagers doing stupid stuff like that. I don’t know if parents are not teaching their children respect for one another, or the popular culture is just so powerful and pervasive that being stupid becomes irresistible. Maybe with all the skewed myths about equality between the sexes, these boys and men really believe that girls and women have the same twisted and perverted interests that they have.

    1. I knew this sort of thing happened but not on this scale. Not until this year. I believe you’re correct that parents are not talking to their kids and talking to them about consequences and the importance of reputation. Once your reputation is damaged it is almost impossible to get your good reputation back. Sad sad sad. Thank you for your insightful comment.

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