Yesterday while I was at the art museum I looked at so many artworks by amazing female artists. Thank I thought about how so many gave up so much so that they could create art. Yes, times were different, but things are still not always as they should be when it comes to double standards, and how people treat each other. I’ll write up the thoughts I wrote down while I was at the museum and share them on a later day. In the meantime I’ll share and old story I wrote a while back. It is is a bit of horror, and a bit of romance, then again isn’t most romance a bit of horror?
A Man Should Have What He Wants
A Nasty Little Vampire Story from Juliette aka Vampire Maman
A house full of books and the ghosts of what could have been.
What can be. Oliver Thomas thought as he sat on the edge of the bed.
He never let himself get close to those he visited over the years. It was easy to become detached just as one could be detached to an apple or a head of lettuce.
She slept quietly. On the nightstand were books, earrings, a clock set for 5:00 a.m., and her glasses. Her husband was snoring and slept in another room. Her children were tucked into their dreams. Oliver made sure of that. They’d all be asleep.
Oliver Thomas kept coming back to her. She was different, by her own accord. Amanda had always been different – the type who saw the world in visions and possibilities. Someone who overcame obstacles. If she grew to be old she’d be a sweet eccentric with her window boxes full of exotic flowers and vast knowledge of the obscure and unusual.
She had a hard time making friends due to her shyness and reluctance to follow up. Her fear of rejection paralyzed her in some areas of her life. Most of life was paralyzing but she seemed to thrive and succeed.
Yet, the woman could light up a room with her wit and charm. She was a success despite her low opinion of herself.
But he’d fallen in love with her in a strange way that someone falls in love with an idea of perfection and the ideal person to share life’s adventures with.
Her teenage kids still hung all over her like toddlers, leaning on her even now. They were taller than she was, dressed in their black band shirts with trendy long hair and black painted nails. Oliver had seen Amanda once, her son with his lanky arm around her shoulder, her daughter with an arm around her waist. How many women, he wondered, envied her for the closeness she had with her children.
If it wasn’t for her children she might have checked out and left the world a long time ago. Since childhood Amanda had been uncomfortable with life and the tremendous effort it took for her to live with herself and her failures.
Oliver saw that Amanda had failed to see her success, except with her children. He didn’t want to think of her marriage with Craig. It worked better than most. In fact, for the most part, her marriage to Craig was an uncommon success.
Craig, the handsome and successful husband, was the love of her life. Even in her dreams Amanda couldn’t cheat on Craig. They’d built a life together. For her that was enough. More than enough she told herself.
But Oliver knew it wasn’t enough. Amanda found her life in others but kept her secret soul and passions locked up, bound in shadows and secrets.
At one time, Oliver and Amanda had been lovers. The memory of her warm skin, her lips on his own, her hands in his hair and her passion haunted him. He’d come and gone from her life assuming she’d always be there.
Now he was only with her in the dream world of the night. She’d remember him in another time and place in long lost memories of centuries past. She’d think she’d had a life in another time with him, a past life of possibilities and promise and passion.
An unlikely candidate this middle aged working mom, too tired and busy to think of herself except when she let her imagination fly as she commuted to school and work in her car each morning, or when she dozed off at night in her own secret places.
The passions were still in her, as it had been when she was young. How could that be? He kissed her then buried his face into her neck and when he’d had enough of her he silently left her with dreams of passion and desire.
The following evening Oliver looked up from his desk and there she was, standing in the doorway. Black dress, apple green sweater, black heels. The blue Coach bag, a 50th birthday present from her husband was slung over her shoulder. She looked she owned the world, but she still didn’t think she was beautiful.
How did she find me here? I never told her where I live?
“Amanda.” He said her name as if in a dream.
“Don’t Amanda me Oliver. I want you to leave me alone.”
He stood and approached her with his hands held out. “It was always the wrong time or place for us.”
She stepped back ignoring his open arms. “Don’t even start with me Oliver. It would have never worked. You always said I was too independent. Then you turned around and called me needy.”
“I never said any of those things.” He was shocked by her accusations.
“You didn’t have to say it. You made it obvious you were thinking it.”
He didn’t respond. This wasn’t the time for the witty dialog they’d shared in the past, the long talks through the night or the sweet lover’s words.
“Amanda, you can’t stand there before me and say that with a straight face.”
She looked at the floor then looked up straight into his eyes. “You never told me you loved me.”
“I didn’t have to.”
“Bull shit. You just expected me to hang around and wait for you to come in and out of my life. It got old Oliver. But it doesn’t matter. I’m married to a man who loves me the way I am. I’m successful, happy and I love my life.”
“I doubt if Craig realizes what a fortunate man he is.”
“Did you ever tell him about me?” Oliver took a step forward. Amanda folded her arms as if to shut him out.
“I haven’t told anyone about you. They’d all think I was nuts. Just like my Aunt Margaret when she talked about her Vampire.”
“You still love me Amanda.” Oliver said those words quietly with such passion that almost no woman would be able to resist. No woman except Amanda.
She turned and left, slamming the door behind her.
Oliver watched from the window as she got in her car and drove away. The slightest hint of regret surged through his dark thoughts. He’d never meet another who captured his heart and his passions like she had. He’d never meet anyone who made him laugh or feel the joy of being like Amanda had.
Oliver heard the steps behind him but didn’t turn around. A warm hand caressed his shoulder.
“Is she gone?” The speaker was obviously annoyed.
“Does she have any idea I’m here?”
Craig looked out the window. “Good. Where do we go from here?”
“Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?”
“My son is an Emo freak who acts in plays and writes poetry for fun. My daughter won’t talk to anyone unless it’s a text. My wife is never going to lose the baby fat or stop telling stupid jokes or snoring or complaining how hard she works. It wasn’t what I signed up for.”
“Just for once I want what I want. I don’t want to go home to a woman who is tired all the time and can’t even comprehend my needs.”
“What about your children? You must care about them on some level.”
“They’ll be fine without me. Amanda will have two million dollars in life insurance to get the kids through college. There’s another 10 million in assets she can sell off if she has to. She’ll make sure her children have wonderful memories of me.”
“The news of your death will break her heart.”
Craig scowled at Oliver. “Amanda is already so miserable she won’t even notice. She’ll be happy to be the unfortunate widow and bask in the glow of her own sorrow. I’m doing her a favor by dying rather than divorcing her.”
“And your girlfriends?” Asked Oliver.
“They’re whores who think they can get ahead by sleeping with the CEO. They’ll both get their pink slips next week. So now what?”
Oliver went back around to his desk and sat in the antique leather chair. “Your car will be found in the river and it will be assumed your body was washed away with the currents. Your wallet and a few clothing items will be found washed up on a beach. It will be assumed that you died.”
“So when do I change?”
“When do I become like you? A Vampire.” Craig asked this impatiently almost sounding like a spoilt teen.
Oliver took a deep breath and answered him. “Tonight if you want, but I’d rather wait until tomorrow.”
Craig leaned on the desk close to the Vampire. “I want this Oliver. I want my freedom.”
“You’ll get what you want Craig.”
“Oliver, I’m telling you…”
Craig started to speak but Oliver held up his hand. “We’ll take my jet to Rome in the morning. By the time we get there you’ll be a different man. The old Craig will be gone forever. In the meantime, you need to see your children one last time.”
Amanda sat in the high school auditorium waiting for the play to start. A Midsummer’s Night Dream. Her son played Lysander and her daughter was playing Puck.
Craig had called earlier to tell her he was working late. He’d been sorry to miss the play but said he’d see it on closing night next weekend. She thought she was going to throw up. She pulled out her phone and listened to the message she’d received right after she’d seen Oliver.
A sing song girlish voice said “Mandy, I mean Amanda, this is Trinity, Craig’s assistant. I wanted to let you know that I’ve been sleeping with your husband for about two years. He said I did all those nasty fetish things you wouldn’t do and I believed him. I really really loved him and would have done anything but he dumped me for Tara Hall. She’s like the VP of Marketing. They’ve been doing it since October so he was two timing on me too. Stupid puke. So when he says he is gone on business he’s really with her. I just thought you’d want to know because you seem like a nice lady.”
It was the fifth time she’d listened to it. Each time she’d hoped she’d heard it wrong but that wasn’t the case.
A text came in from Craig saying he had a change of plans and was on his way.
Concentrate. Don’t think about him. It isn’t true. He’ll be here any minute. Don’t cry.
The house lights went down and the play started.
Oliver Thomas stood on the side of the river and watched the emergency crews on the opposite shore drag out a sliver convertible, the headless body of the driver still strapped in the seat. Some unfortunate member of the police department would find sightless eyes attached to a severed head staring up at him from the floor of the passenger seat.
Witnesses said another car had forced him off the road. The convertible rolled and went into the water. It had been too dark to get any plate numbers or a good description of the other car.
Craig wanted to be free of his wife and children. A man should have what he wants after all.
Now Oliver would do it right. He’d wait a few months, he had time and he’d be there for Amanda and her children, like he should have been all along.
~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman