As I write about love letters and romance, paranormal and otherwise, I realized that December is a pivotal month in my own romantic history.
It was in December that I realized that Teddy was the one. Yes, that one.
More than twenty years later he is still the one.
It is one of those once in a lifetime loves that one can have more than once.
Let me explain that one…
We both (Teddy and I) know that there is more than one person out there for everyone. There is more than one. Believe me. Even for Vampires with our relatively small population (maybe 60,000 worldwide.) But none the less statistically it is both easy and extremely difficult to find someone who is a perfect match.
We’ve all had those ships that pass in the night moments. We’ve been in the wrong place at the wrong time with the right person. We’ve grown up and grown tired and missed opportunities. We’ve all been in serious relationships that haven’t worked out.
But then it happens. He walks into a room and you know. You talk and it is as if you’ve always been in love, but you haven’t yet said it. There is a connection you can’t explain. There is a comfort level that is, well, easy and comfortable.
Other often mention how no matter where Teddy and I are, we are always holding hands, or one of us has a hand on the other’s back or knee. We’re always close.
Of course we finish each other’s words. We say the exact same things at the exact same time. We are so very different, yet we’ve grown to be the same.
That might be the key – it is the growth. Not growing apart, but growing up and growing together. But at the same time each continuing our own unique personal growth, and supporting that growth in each other.
Of course we talk. We talk a lot. Not just about the kids or the house, but about everything. We just shoot the breeze. We laugh. We do silly things with the cats, and the kids.
He doesn’t read my blog or get into my other professional life. I don’t get too involved in his professional life. Even our temperaments are different. He is usually the straight man, but he can be pretty funny too. I am the artist. He is the art historian. I am the writer. He is the realist. We are both romantics.
It hasn’t always been easy, but nothing is. Relationships are a lot of work. Anything worth doing is a lot of work.
And throw all of the old fashioned gender based role shit out of the window. Yes, I am definitely a woman and embrace all of that but I am also strong and independent. I’m with a man who appreciates that. We’re equals. We’re best friends. We’re together.
So before you discount the person under the mistletoe this Christmas season give him a second look. Expand your horizons. Throw out your preconceived notions. You don’t have to have everything in common, that will come. But don’t miss a spark that shines in the dark that might go out before you know it. If you see that ship you want to be on – then get on it.
I wasn’t sure what to do about Teddy when I first met him. I was afraid if I said anything that he’d reject me. I’d known him forever. So I wrote him a letter and mailed it off on Christmas Eve. And two days after the New Year he called me. We’ve been together ever since. No second thoughts. No regrets.
When we were younger it might not have worked between us,
That said, make sure the one you hitch your proverbial star to that you have the same values and morals. Make sure you both want the same things out of life.
But a word of caution, if you aren’t a Vampire don’t fall in love with one. It makes things complicated. Way too complicated. Werewolves are even more complicated (and they stink when they get wet.)
I hadn’t planned on writing this but, like my relationship with Teddy, if just kind of happened.
Take the chance under the mistletoe, or a long conversation over a glass of wine, then a walk on the city streets under the Christmas lights. You never know – that walk just might just be forever – even if it is with someone you already know.
~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman