Skipping the drama and skipping town

I’m skipping anything political tonight (pathetic speeches by a long list of D list celebrities with an insufficient number of brain cells, plagiarized passages, and general self congratulations of people who are lower than the worst soulless Shadow Creeping Vampire) and watching Preacher (which I recorded from a few nights ago), and America’s Got Talent. Or we might go out, or take the dog for a walk in the woods under a full moon, or we could do anything, except partake in the spectacle of something which both puzzles and maddens us at the sheer waste of time and stupidity of it all.

We’ll not doubt skip the other convention as well.

We vote, but we are not like them.

Saturday was my husband Teddy’s birthday. Someone suggested I cover my mouth with frosting and ask him to lick it off. As you can imagine, I politely shrugged off that brilliant idea for something a bit more subtle.

I spend the evening among a band of Vampires from France and America. The flow of languages was like music. We talked of outrageous adventures, and plans for more outrageous adventures. All of the teens left to play Pokemon Go in the historic old central street of town.

New friends and old gathered. We were all the same in our common love of my Teddy, but all so different. That is what makes it interesting. That is what makes us adore each other even more. It is that discovery of ideas and stories that makes us make our magic together.

Clara and I are busy packing for another road trip, half way across the country to the USA National Roller Skating Championships in Lincoln, Nebraska. In all of the novels and movies Vampires just sit around in the dark looking for warm necks to suck. All they do is lurk and act creepy. In reality, we’re on the go. Warm necks are everywhere, so that is never a problem. Why lurk around in the shadows where there are places to go, people to meet, obscure sports to be champions in. 

We’ll keep you posted from the road. My husband Teddy and son Garrett are staying at home – holding down the fort and the cats. They’ll get in some male bonding time, you know, beer, blood and belching.

In the meantime I’ve been interviewing my old friend John on what it is like growing up next to Vampires. His family has lived next to my kind for generations. It makes for some interesting viewpoints.

I’m also edition, doing damage control, and figuring out some new projects. I’ve had a lot of suggestions about making some of my series into books. The most often mentioned by my readers are “Vampire Diary” featuring Vlad the Vampire King, and the Austin and Elizabeth stories (The Hunter.) Then there is that science fiction story I need to finish.

I need to finish a lot of things. Don’t we all.

And Nigel the Ghost. There is a lot more to come out of that guy.

So like I said, I’ll be sending blog cards from the road, plus more random thoughts about teens, parenting, Vampires, modern life, and other stuff.

One more thing… Do yourself a favor and turn off the TV news. Radio too. Stick to music you can sing along to and gardening shows.

xoxox

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

cat-tongue-catster

 

 

 

 

Today is Sunday…

Today is Sunday.

Yesterday my teenage daughter talked about Christina Grimmie. She’d followed Christina on YouTube. Christina Grimmie was so alive and full of joy. Then she wasn’t.

She was murdered in cold blood while she greeted people in Orlando, Florida.

We talked about her brother, who from what we understand, kept the killer from possibly killing more people. Then I thought about her brother and how broken his heart and soul must be today. We talked about crazy killers. We talked about hate. We talked about senseless acts of violence. It made us sad.

Then Sunday came to Orlando.

Then my daughter said, “I can see how young men with Middle Eastern backgrounds can learn to hate. At school the Middle Eastern kids are singled out and yelled at. They’re called terrorist. They’re picked on.”

I asked her about her brown friends, her friend with Mexican parents, and her gay friends.

She told me they don’t get picked on. Nobody cares. There are too many of them. That was her answer.

The high school has about 2,500 kids from two different towns. One is 85% white. The other town, the one I live in is 89% white. That is just the way things are.

When I got married my husband’s three best friends were pale as snow, dark as a moonless night, and Persian. Two have since passed on, but they are in our hearts. We never cared what they looked like or where their ancestors came from. We never cared what Gods they worshiped.

My best friend’s sister used to be her brother. We love them both.

I don’t think twice that old friends are gay, or straight, or have a different religion, or different skin tone. Nobody can be paler than me except someone who is a true albino.

So it is hard for me to understand the hate.

It is hard for me to understand why the stupid ass kids at the school single out the Middle Eastern kids, be they Muslim or Christian or Jewish – all 30 of them. It is pure ignorance. It is hate without motive. It is WRONG. When kids get picked on for no reason, with no defense, they learn to hate. They learn to despise their haters. Hate comes full circle. Hate becomes violence. Hate embraces ignorance.

Where the fuck are the parents of both the haters and those who are bullied? Where are they?

Teachers stop it when they see it, but there isn’t a school wide anti hate campaign. Maybe there should be.

In a perfect world, a logical world, a good world, that the only scary things would be those that go bump in the night – like ghosts, rouge Vampires, aliens from space, giant insects, demons, and Werewolves. But those things are tame compared to the unpredictable forces of hate that have come into our lives and hearts.

I would like to think that everyone could take the opportunity to NOW put away the hate, and come together. Forget what the crap you choose to read in your chosen book of your chosen God.

As my husband says, “if God tells me to hate someone then I don’t want him to be my God.”

Take the time not to point fingers and speculate. Take the time not to judge a large group of loosely connected people by the actions of one crazy deranged individual.

Now is the time for healing. It is a time for support. It is a time for love. It is a time to learn more about people who are different from us. When we learn about those who are different we will find that they are not so different than we are.

Let me say that AGAIN: When we learn about those who are different we will find that they are not so different than we are.

Over and over and over I say “TALK TO YOUR KIDS.” Talk to them about these issues. Talk to them about Orlando. Talk to them about the Salem and McCarthy witch trials. Talk to them about WW2. Talk to them about school shootings. Talk to them about Matthew Shepard. Talk to them about everything that ever happened because of hate. I don’t mean talk at them. I mean have a discussion. Have a meaningful discussion.

As a parent you can help stop the hate. It is the generation our children belong to that will change the world – and I truly believe that if we keep the discussion and our hearts and brains open then THEY WILL change the world for the better.

My heart goes out to Orlando.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

Play Ball (and Other Summer Vampire News)

“We’ve known the fallacies and misleading contradictions spread about our kind,” said my dear old Dad with a little bit of smile, along with a little bit of fang. “Let them spread it my darlings, it is to our advantage.”

My teenage daughter and twenty-two year old niece listened to their Grandpapa who’d lived through the English Revolution (yes the one in 1688) and decided to start a movement with his fellow Vampires. They’d never lived in the shadows that much, and they didn’t have any plans to follow old dark ways.

I listened to his voice that still held a touch of an English accent. Then they started to talk about Baseball and this year’s Giants lineup. That is one of the advantages of not living in the shadows, especially if you have nice club seats during an evening game. Play ball.

I’m looking forward to a lot of summer fun with both of my kids (Garrett and Clara) and my niece and nephew (Laurel and Logan) RIGHT HERE so I can use them for blog fodder. Whoo Hoo. That is more Vampire fun than most folks can handle – but I know you’re up to it.

 

i-heart-giants

 

On another summertime note, I will be starting up my famous “America’s Got Talent and Cocktails” blog posts soon. The show is in it’s final season unfortunately. But don’t cry because it looks like it will be a good season – maybe the best. And yes, it will make you cry because it is so good. Plus I’ll be posting a new batch of Vampire cocktail recipes and party suggestions.

I will also feature uncensored comments from my own Vampire peanut gallery.

When I started Vampiremaman.com in 2012 the “America’s Got Talent and Cocktails” posts were one of the things that made this blog so famous. No kidding. So watch along with the Vampire family and let us know who your favorites, and not so favorites are this season.

By the way, if you don’t like the show, don’t read the posts.

 

AGT and Cocktails

AGT and Cocktails

Don’t forget… Thursday, June 7 is the next “Ask Juliette” day, where you get to ask me, Juliette aka Vampire Maman, questions about anything and I’ll answer. It is the ultimate advice and information column. If you have a burning question about parenting, relationships, life, Vampires, Zombies, or whatever please plop that burning question in the comments section below or if you’re feeling a bit shy, email me at juliettevampiremom@gmail dot com (you know, .com but if I write it out spamming troll robots will find my email and I’ll never find your message.) All questions received by midnight June 8 will be answered. Any questions I can’t get to will be answered the following week.

 

The fact that he always brought his brothers and their tiny chairs along on dates should have clued me in on just how weird he was.

The fact that he always brought his brothers and their tiny chairs along on dates should have clued me in on just how weird he was.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

What is your favorite trait in a politician? Or a Vampire? Hey, they’re not the same.

With all of the debates and crazy and totally insane political crap going on right now it is high time I do an official political poll. You may choose one or more answers and you may do the polls as many times as you want (to make sure it is fair and completely scientific.)

So…

 

What is your favorite trait in a politician?

 

 

What is your favorite trait in a Vampire?

 

 

If everybody running for President of the United States VANISHED today, who do you think should run? Who would you replace them with?

 

 

What do you like to eat?

 

I added the last one in case I have a party or have your over to watch a movie anytime soon.

All of the answers will be scientifically tabulated and sent to all of the major news organizations. Thank you for your time.

Vote today and vote often.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

March Reading List – Great New Fiction

Morning at the Vineyard
is FREE
for the next few days (until Tuesday.)

Pass it on. Share with your friends. Leave a nice review.

A collection of stories from Vampire Maman: A Vampire hung-over wakes up in the house of serial killers; poetry from a teenage girl brings a Greek god to his knees; elderly vampires, lost loves, a lunch date with zombies and opera singers, and modern vampire family life, fill the pages of this volume with humor, romance, adventure, parenting in this collection of unique tangled tales.
Juliette Kings is a highly innovative and insightful writer with a gift for creating a fantasy world within a “real” world context.

 

Morning at the Vineyard now available on amazon.com (and tell the folks at NPR and the LA Times that this is the best book you've ever read and that they should interview Juliette Kings NOW. Any other media outlet would work as well. Yes, this is shameless but what do you expect? I'm a Vampire. We have no shame.

Morning at the Vineyard now available on amazon.com (and tell the folks at NPR and the LA Times that this is the best book you’ve ever read and that they should interview Juliette Kings NOW. Any other media outlet would work as well. Yes, this is shameless but what do you expect? I’m a Vampire. We have no shame.

 

New!
Exceptional Liars by Marla Todd

Alex Goldstein has a thriving law practice with his wife Tasha Alexander. Life is is good. Well, except for the fact that he drinks too much, and his wife regularly cheats on him. To keep his mind off of his problems Alex writes about by serial killers. His most recent obsession is The Killer of Virtue.

Liz Hobbs is born into a large family of sneaky manipulative children with an unhealthy fear of God only ranks second to the fear of their narcissistic parents. After the murder of her brother and only ally Steve, then the loss of a college scholarship for bad behavior, Liz falls in love. Unfortunately that includes falling into an abusive marriage with relationship counselor Greg Atkinson.

Liz decides to end it all and jumps from a bridge, only to find herself in the bed of her friend Darren Crawford. He isn’t just a friend; he is The Killer of Virtue. Fortunately for Liz, Darren drops dead of natural causes. Now with everyone thinking she is dead, Liz pulls a Huck Finn and runs.

After misreading the phone number of a women’s shelter Liz ends up in office of Alexander and Goldstein. Alex helps her build a new life as his own life falls apart.

Exceptional Liars is a roller coaster ride of a book full of unexpected twists and turns. Witty dialogue and interesting characters makes this book one of the best new novels of 2016.

Just out on Amazon.com (CLICK HERE)

Exceptional Liars by marla Todd

 

Author Information: Marla Todd helps with Vampire Maman from time to time and manages the blog westcoastreview.wordpress.com.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

Musings of a Vampire Mom: All Worked Up & Getting Along

Jasmine and Oscar

I was feeling all worked up yesterday about everything in the news. You know, like the frustrating presidential election process (why didn’t anyone qualified run?), and why the chancellor of UCD hasn’t been fired yet (yes she is the reason why a public college education is so expensive – greed), and why there are so many stupid movie titles like “Batman V Superman” (did someone buy the last pair of XXL tights?), and a myriad of other stupid things.

But that has passed and reality kicks in. Reality around here is a relative term.

One could say that Vampires are like politicians in that we are constantly spouting off half-truths and lies, but it isn’t that way at all. We’re in survival mode. We have to hide what we are. Nobody wants to have their head cut off, be burned to a crisp, have a stake through their heart, or be sealed up in a musty crypt forever. We have a good thing going. Nobody is going to take that away from us. Politicians, on the other hand, have no excuses. None.

My children are engulfed in school. Every day I’m told in person or by phone or text what they learned and discovered. This isn’t something I demand. It is just what they do. I’d like to think I instilled that excitement in them. Then again, I see that natural joy of learning and discovery. It is always sad to me when I see that desire to learn and excitement killed in a young person. We must always keep questioning and learning. Yes, I know there are quiet children who need information coaxed out of them… but never accept a grunt for an answer. Never demand an answer – engage the young people you know.

The more young folks are engaged the less chance of a scary future. Young people need to be encouraged to question, research, discover, and make educated conclusions on their own. And we, the older generations, need to listen to them.

As I write this I have one cat sitting on the table next to my laptop, a puppy curled at my feet, and another cat on the chair next to me.

The facts:

  • Both cats were close to our old dog Jasmine.
  • Jasmine loved both of the cats.
  • Gloria the calico hates Oscar the gray cat.
  • Oscar would like to be friends with Gloria.
  • Oscar is slightly afraid of Gloria.
  • Gloria doesn’t give a shit.
  • Oscar and Gloria hang out together when they are outside.
  • Alice the puppy is hurt because the cats don’t like her.
  • But the cats don’t run away from her.
  • Alice tries.

Yet, they all sit here with me and act civil towards each other. The cats will eat out of the same bowl today. The pup will get closer and closer to the cats but they won’t attack her, only occasionally hiss. They accept the fact that they have to live together. Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone could be like that.

And why yes, I am rambling on and thinking out loud today.

A cold storm is blowing through and I find myself alone with my thoughts, and three animals who let me know that they need my companionship. I have to admit that I enjoy theirs.

Today is one of those days when I’ve tried to dredge up stories from my past and I can’t bring up anything. It is like a movie with somebody else starring in it.

Today is also a day for new beginnings to look to the future – for my kids, my animals, and for me. Only my notebook for this chapter is still blank.

So we shall see.

 

vm_rick

 

And don’t forget that Thursday is ASK JULIETTE (Ask a Vampire – Advice for Everyone.) It is a regular Thursday feature on Vampire Maman. If you have a question about parenting, relationships, Vampires, other paranormal stuff, gardening, travel, science, fashion, or anything, and I mean anything, just ask, and I’ll answer. Put your questions in the comments on this post, or email me at juliettevampiremom @ gmail .com

May you find no bad blood in your goblet of life, and no ghosts in your soul.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

vampire teens