Yes, I dated that guy… and other random thoughts

I’m going off to the woods to howl at the moon (just kidding I’m a Vampire not a Werewolf), hike, take in waterfalls and the wonders of nature and WRITE. Sooooo there will be no Short Story Sunday for a few days or other posts because Internet service will be spotty at best and more than likely nonexistent (like in the old days.)

So in the meantime: LISTEN to THIS (click here)

Look at the pictures below.

Available on Amazon and other fine online booksellers. Just remember to leave the light on. Creepies.

Available on Amazon and other fine online booksellers. Just remember to leave the light on. Creepies.

 

Morning at the Vineyard now available on amazon.com (and tell the folks at NPR and the LA Times that this is the best book you've ever read and that they should interview Juliette Kings NOW. Any other media outlet would work as well. Yes, this is shameless but what do you expect? I'm a Vampire. We have no shame.

Morning at the Vineyard now available on amazon.com (and tell the folks at NPR and the LA Times that this is the best book you’ve ever read and that they should interview Juliette Kings NOW. Any other media outlet would work as well. Yes, this is shameless but what do you expect? I’m a Vampire. We have no shame.

Kissed by a Vampire

Support your local Artistic Roller Skating Club.

Support your local Artistic Roller Skating Club.

this guy

 

Yes, I did date THAT GUY but that is another post on another day. Have a good weekend everyone.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

Morning at the Vineyard – Collected Stories

tangled tales cover

Now available at Amazon.com

A collection of 26 stories from Vampire Maman.

This isn’t just another “my book is out spam.”

This is a THANK YOU note for all of you who have followed Vampire Maman. You’ve read my stories and tales of Vampire adventure, parenting, romance and thoughts on life. You’ve left comments, feedback and love. You’ve shown so much support. And best of all you’ve really entertained me. I had no idea when I started this little Vampire/Parenting-Blog adventure that you were out there.

I also want to say thank you to all of my friends in the WPaD publishing group. You’re more than writers – you’re family.

So anyway, I’ll do a proper spamming of this book later – I just want to say LOOK. HEY.

But now it is night and I must go do Vampire things. You know how it is.

 

xoxo

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

 

 

Alone or Not – Musings from a Modern Vampire Mom

edge

 

Today someone made a comment to me about taking care of everyone except me.

I guess.

I close my eyes and think of walking on the beach alone. The cold water, the long stretch of beach all to myself. Not the warm beaches to the south but the cold windy beaches of Northern California that call me.

Before school starts I will go. I won’t be alone. The kids will come with me. Maybe friends too. Maybe the husband. Even the dog or a brother or two. It will be a party.

Before I was married I used to travel a lot alone. Sometimes others would question that and be puzzled but I was never bothered by it. If I wanted to go somewhere I’d go.

I tell my kids “you’re your own best traveling companion and sometime your only traveling companion. You have to get along with yourself if you want to have a good trip.” I haven’t always been my own best travel companion but at least I’ve gone places despite the miserable company. Sometimes it has led me to a place where I was good company with myself.

In the triple digit summer heat I seek the cool dark places of both body and spirit. I haven’t had time to have that luxury, not much.

Then again, I spend time above ground in public places laughing with my kids, or making them laugh.

The only time I even stop to think about “alone time” is when I sit down to write, and when I’m writing this blog.

My other writing time is filled with characters that have nothing to do with me. They have much more exciting lives than I do. Well almost. They aren’t Vampires. I mean, you can’t top that.

My brother Andrew once told me, “For such solitary creatures we spend an extraordinary amount of time seeking out the company of others.”

Even a cold touch of a Vampire brings comfort. A flash of smile and a reflection off of eyes in the dark and the faint sound of a laugh in the quiet of the night brings joy.

 

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

moth

 

 

Stories We Shall Never Tell

night street

 

In the dark

We ran through the streets

Slick with rain

Back alleys

Darkened windows

Broken glass

Rats

The smell of decay

And death.

Then into grand mansions

We’d fly

Cloaks off

The rustle of silk

A white tie

A flash of fang

The smell of wine

Cigars

And blood.

We were young

Carefree

With stories

We shall never

Tell

Our own

Children.

 

 

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

readbyvampires

AGT and bottled beer – It isn’t Penny Dreadful but we can watch it with the kids.

TV Reviews and My Own Bad Writing Because I’m Moving FAST Here Folks.

We had the usual peanut gallery of Vampires over to watch ATG Wednesday night. They’re still in the try out stage and it looks like a fun summer season is ahead of us with some really great talent. Below are a few of the acts and comments from the gallery.

Almost as fun as Penny Dreadful without the one big gratuitous sex scene and the one big fuckwood scene, excuse me Deadwood inspired scene where a multitude of f-bombs are dropped for no good reason except to make you say “What the Fuck?”

Penny Dreadful is wonderful and campy and silly. The husband can’t keep up with it. We lived throughout this the first time these stories were out – but there are so many characters and he never read much fantasy. My husband figures he is already a Vampire so why read about it much less watch TV about it. But I love it. I love Vanessa’s dresses. I love the Gothic feel. I love the creature. It is so much fun. Of course you gotta love Dorian Gray even with the random WTF moment when he was kissed by the American. Alright, I have to admit, I’d kiss either one of those guys, or at least bite their necks. Anyway… back to family entertainment.

The Revolutionary War program Turn turned sour for use early on. We had such high hopes but the historic inaccuracies, plot weakness and overall confusion and sheer boredom factors caused us to discontinue watching it.

Then there was Ripper Street. What happened there? It could have been really good but there again the characters were bogged down by silly writing and the show sort of vanished. Copper was fun too and pretty campy. It keeps my Irish friends laughing (not because it is accurate either.)

Nothing could have been worse than last season’s Dracula. That was so bad on so many levels.

Why on most historic television programs (I’m not talking about anything on PBS so don’t even comment on it) – why on most historic television programs, especially those taking place before 1920 are the women’s clothing and makeup so inaccurate?

In the early days of TV Miss Kitty and all of Little Joe’s girlfriends looked just like they’d come out of a 1960’s beauty salon complete with 1960’s bras. So many costume designers forget the importance of the silhouette. Things haven’t gotten much better.

So maybe that is why we like things like River Monsters and Life Below Zero and America’s Got Talent. Everybody loves big fish with giant teeth and a guy with a British accent. We all like rugged individuals living in Alaska. And we all like talent and variety. And we don’t have to worry about costumes or historic details.

Now what you’ve all been waiting for… Here is our rundown for America’s Got Talent for Wednesday, June 4, 2014.

We missed the beginning but came in just as two really good-looking young men were causing Howie to not be able to read. It was a fun sort of magic type trip.

Julie age 15. Amazing young singer. She was so cute and has such a lovely and mature voice. Go Julie. Comments from the peanut gallery were: Wow, sign her up now. All these skanks on the radio can’t hit a not at all and listen to this girl. Girlfriend’s good.

Tap Dancers – two cute guys in caps. These two guys (age 17 and 18) were exceptionally cute and could go a long way with some practice. Stay tuned.

Motorcycle stunt guys always make me want to go get another beer. I’m just not that into it. Let me see you jump over the Grand Canyon or over the Washington Monument or something.

There were jump ropers. Next please.

There were pogo stick jumpers. Now that was fun, but not a million dollar act.

And then there were the cutest 8 year old triplets I have every seen. Oh my goodness. Look them up on YouTube. One threw cards while the others assisted. I don’t care what these kids do; they got the prize for being the cutest things ever.

A young singer named Miguel was cute and could sing. We’ll see him back.

There was a pair of Salsa Dancers. That was two guys dancing together. They were good. One was from Sacramento. Go guys go!

Some chick did acrobatics while pretending to swim away from sharks on a screen background. She said it was her imagination going wild. OK. Good for you. That was nice but really annoying and a little too sweet for me. Sort of like a Starburst candy with 5 times the sugar.

Rather than cocktails we were drinking Blue Moon White Belgian-Style Wheat Ale. Mmmmmm. Good stuff. Yes, Vampires drink beer, but only cold beer and only good beer.

 

Have fun and don’t watch to much Tee Vee!

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

 

Cheers!