Oddities and Ends

Have you ever had one of those days when you look somebody in the eye and tell them, “You will fail as a Vampire.”

This isn’t one of those things someone can practice and master. You either have what it takes or you don’t.

Yes, it has been one of those days.

Cocktail time.

A lot of people come to this blog looking for directions on how to become a Vampire. Either that or wanting to know how a Vampire turns someone into a Vampire.

It isn’t how you think and you aren’t going to hear about it from me.

I can only imagine what would happen if the world filled up with completely unsuccessful, pitiful, failure Vampires. It would make great reality TV with names like “Blood Sick,” and “American Vampire,” or “Vlad Knows Best.” Or on MTV it would be called “Reality Sucks.” No thank you. And no intervention shows because you can’t go back.


Next week Clara and I are going to be on the road. We’re leaving the boys at home for a big sporting event in a city with few entertainments. My plan is to finish a book I’ve been working on for a while. Clara’s plan is to win every single event (or do her best) and work on AP History and AP English summer class work.

The book is not about Vampires, Werewolves, Ghosts or other paranormal beings. There are no Gothic overtones. It is just a novel with a lot of twists and turns and I hope… I hope I can pull it off.

And yes, I’m going to have an editor look at the book before I send it out into the world. You’ve read this blog. You I can’t edit.

The only reason I’m telling you about this is an excuse to use the wonderful Christopher Lee Vampire Meme about writing created by my creative friend Jason Kemp (J Harrison Kemp.)



And yes, you should be writing.

I should be writing, so have a good evening. Enjoy the shadows, enjoy those you love and do something creative.


~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

10 thoughts on “Oddities and Ends

  1. Even cities with few entertainments can be full of distractions. Best of luck on your writing, and I look forward to hearing about Clara winning all her events.

    • I never followed True Blood and haven’t read any of the Sookie Stackhouse novels. That said, I was thinking along the lines of all of the Hillbilly shows or Antique Shows. One could be called, “Stuff I Owned,” where Vampires go look for stuff they owned a hundred years ago.

      • Hey, now: don’t knock “hillbilly vampires,” y’all (besides, the only West Virginians who actually sound like that seem to be the ones hired for shows like MTV’s “Buckwild.”) As far as the Stackhouse novels, I read the first one and gave up until my friend/co-worker Timothy said the TV shows on HBO were hilarious. He has this entire collection of vamp movies and TV seasons, but I have to pick on him for it since his last name (for real) is “Harker.”

  2. Have a great trip! We’re off to Portland tomorrow so my daughter can attend an Ed Sheeran concert she got FREE tickets to with a friend! We’ll be back Sunday, think we’ll take in the movie Jurassic World at the Lloyd Center while she’s at the concert less than a half mile away from it. Now you just keep on writing when you can… XOXO

  3. I understand why you would want everyone to become a vampire. But I am however curious about something else.
    You are careful and respectful with your “prey”. In many ways your soft hearted and loveable.
    Is it only a myth that vampires kill their “meals” because they could reveal who their “torturer” was?


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