My clock is a little off… musings on sleep, time and creativity.

silver watch


It is said that we all have an internal clock. I know I do. The problem is that my life goes by a different schedule or no schedule.

Plus sleep is a problem. Sleep is like a spirit who doesn’t like me, or at least have a love hate relationship with me. Sleep is a friend with benefits (we used to call it a F____ Buddy) who torments us with a promise of love then yanks it back. Sleep throws rocks at my window one day begging for me to let him in. Then he won’t show up for weeks. Sleep is not my friend. I know, I know, I have to just get over it. Plus the day/night/Vampire thing is a bitch if you want to live in the regular world, which if you have kids, is something you need to do. I mean, I know you know what I mean.

But forget Sleep. He’s a bastard and we don’t need to talk about him right now.

My cats keep a rigid internal clock. They are up in the wee hours before dawn. They let me know that 5:00 am, before the sun comes up, is time for breakfast. It is then that my own clock sets in and creativity flows the best. It is a new day without the distractions from the world around me. It is the time before I start wondering why I’m up during the day instead of the night. It is before the time I have to get my teens ready for school (oh the drama of it all.) It is a time when my Vampire husband is tending to his own business. It is a time when it is my time alone, with just my thoughts and the cats.

All parents need this time alone. Your kids need it too. We all have our prime time. Our time for creativity, our time for work, our down time, our up time, our own clocks… even if the clocks are a little off.

Yes my clock is a little off, but then again, I’m a little off too. But that isn’t a good thing or a bad thing. It’s just a thing.

And so is coffee, which I need badly right now.

Wishing you all a good week. Expect more on high school, ancient vampires and other quite unexpected adventures and musings in the coming days.


~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman




It isn’t a good thing or a bad thing. It is just a thing.

I’ve often written about regrets and mistakes. We learn from those experiences and in turn teach our children so they don’t ever end up living with the burden of so many “I wish I had” experiences.

My husband Teddy always says “If all of those bad things didn’t happen we wouldn’t be where we are now. It has all, good and bad, led up to this.”

But sometimes I wonder about his deepest thoughts in his heart – the heart that used to pump hot blood and had a finite lifespan. I wonder if he still thinks back to the days when he was human.

For one who has always been a Vampire I can only imagine what it is, or was like to be one of them.

To be one thing then being forced into a metamorphic transformation into something different, without your consent, without prior knowledge is beyond compare of almost any other experience. But one deals with it…usually…best case scenario.

I know there are times when he has wished for a normal life, or normal for most people. Most regular human type people.

Teddy would have been dead by 1950. More than likely he would have died in the 1930’s or before then.

It was last Friday when he came home in a good mood. I knew who he’d had for lunch. Several times a month they sit in a bar by the river for hours talking about everything under the sun. Then they go back to his office and… well, he leaves with just the right amount of blood and she leaves happy as well.

This sort of arrangement, for a married man no less, would have seemed totally unacceptable and morally corrupt for the Victorian man my husband used to be. Now he looks forward to his encounters with his “regulars.” I have my own encounters. It is what we do. We’re Vampires (for goodness sakes.)

But there are times when he expresses a reverence for the elderly and those with experiences and wisdom that comes from living. He wonders if he’ll ever have that sort of wisdom.

I believe he does, he just can’t see it. I see it in what he teaches his children and how he lives his life. He is open and honest with our kids about being different. He can give the knowledge about what it is like to be like everyone else.

You know, we’re not ghouls who hold people down and rip their throats out. We have a bit more class and refinement than that.

But still, sometimes I wonder, would he go back and change things? Would he choose to stay ignorant of our world? Would he choose to never have tasted blood, or never to have tasted my kiss, or loved our Vampire kids?

Honestly, I don’t think he ever wonders about it. He just accepts it. That is a good thing. And is it a good thing or a bad thing that he is a Vampire? For me it is a good thing. For him it is just a thing. It is what it is.

Like he says “If all of those bad things didn’t happen we wouldn’t be where we are now. It has all, good and bad, led up to this.”


~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman


Teddy's Gold Watch - Made in 1810

Teddy’s Gold Watch – Made in 1810

To steal a moment

I run my fingers across your forearm

Ever so lightly

Your cool skin is mine

Then you smile

Your lips are on my shoulder

Then my neck

And on my lips.



We talk forever

Share our thoughts

We laugh

We never run out

Of things to say



Now years later

We’re too busy to linger

In the luxury of nights

Because we’re parents

And we’re tired





But still

A chance will come

To steal a moment

A touch of the hand

A brush of the lips

My hands through your hair

An afternoon phone call

To say

I love you.


~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman


Dark Waters

creppy fish

Dark waters

Behind glass

Dark shapes

Covered in spines

And slime

As cold as death

No pretty tropical pets

Are these creatures

From my nightmares

They tap the glass

Until it breaks

And wakes

Me from my

Cold blooded nightmare.


More dream and sleep related posts from Vampire Maman … and Ghosts, Vampires and other related stuff (click on the links below):

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

Women are funny

My brother Valentine (Val) is one of the “go to” guys for romantic advice for the single Vampire guys in our area. One evening not long ago, while visiting the Ancient Vampires Tellias and Eleora I overheard his discussing women with our friend Matthew.

Matthew, a widower with a teenage son, used to be what we call a “Shadow Creeper,” That is an old fashioned brooding Vampire who lives in the shadows and stopped their clocks in the 19th century. The world is not kind to them and life brings little joy to them. With a small child to raise Matthew decided to join the world of Modern Vampires. It has been an adjustment needless to say.

Valentine: Women are funny.

Matthew: Funny? What do you mean by funny?

Valentine: They have a good sense of humor. They laugh out loud, The tell jokes and make bad puns. It is so cute.

Tellias: Don’t look for coy Matthew or you’ll spend the next 200 years alone.

Matthew looked slightly uncomfortable. “I’m not used to them being so open. There are no formal introductions or rules. It is as if they feel they run the world.

Valentine: They do rule the world.

Tellias: They’ve worked hard to rule the world. But let me tell you something Matthew. Women have worked hard for what they have. They’ve risked their lives and reputations. All the while they’ve taken care of us and of their children…and they take care of those who can’t care for themselves. So if they laugh a little or flirt with an attractive Vampire then let them. Enjoy their forwardness. Savor it.

Valentine: Matthew, aside from eye contact and good hygiene women want a sense of humor. They want a guy who laughs with them, not at them. They want someone who makes them smile. You don’t need to show your fangs.

Tellias: Don’t show your fangs. Never show your fangs.

Valentine: We can talk all night but what you need to do is get out there and just talk to women. Not as a romantic partner but just as friends. Get some practice. There isn’t any hurry.

I listened at the three male Vampires talked about relationships. It wasn’t anything earth shattering or unique. Just three friends, talking about women. Three men who just happen to be Vampires.

Tellias has been with his true love Eleora for 2,000 years. Val has been single but with a healthy appreciation of women. Needless to say he never has to spend a night alone. And with any luck, Matthew will find his way and his heart.

Click here for: Uncle Val’s Advice about Women (for Vampires and everyone else)

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman

red heart