Don’t haunt yourself (because real ghost are bad enough)

Let me tell you about ghosts.

I hate ghosts.

They’re sneaky dishonest depressed creatures that have neither body nor soul. They covet our lives and our love. When they come into our lives they cause nothing but annoyance like a dripping faucet or an Internet connection that never works right.

Or they can haunt you in the worst ways possible.

Ghosts feed on your fears and insecurities.

So I tell my kids that there are the ghosts that are disembodied unfortunates who covet our lives, but there are other ghosts that we create.

Those are the ghosts of our own lives and deeds.

Those are the events that we can’t let go of until they drive us insane or at least make us depressed and uneasy.

  • There are ghosts of romances and affairs of the past.
  • There are the ghosts of what could have been (one of the most dangerous ghosts we can create.)
  • There are ghosts of guilt.
  • There are ghosts of resentment.
  • There are ghosts of what might be if only…

I won’t expound on all of these points. But you know what they mean and you know how they are made and how they sit heavy on hearts and souls of both regular humans, Vampires and Werewolves.

It is wise that you warn your teens so they’ll be free of these things. Yes, these ghosts can weigh them down worse than any chains worn by Marley’s ghost in A Christmas Carol.  These ghosts will ruin relationships, jobs, school, success in life and happiness. You can’t afford to….

Wait a minute…I’ll be back….what the…what is he doing here?

“Look at you so full of yourself with advice for others. You’re such a know it all,” a voice said from over my shoulder.

“Go away,” I hissed at the Ghost looking over my shoulder. Damn him. I thought the nasty little bastard had gone for good.

“Bitch.”

“I know a great exorcist. Want to meet him?”

“Be careful Vampire or someone will put a stake through your heart.”

“At least I have a heart.”

“I would have expected more of you, I mean, maybe a little paranormal energy to boot me out of the room or something along those lines. But you just sit there with your laptop writing about bogus crap about parenting and your petty little words of half assed wisdom.”

I gave him the look. “You’re a ghosts with horrible ghosts of your own. I can’t even imagine the burden that must be. You really ought to just let them go.”

“I can’t imagine the regrets you must have Vampire. How old are you? A hundred and sixty?”

“One hundred and fifty-three. But no, I have no regrets. I’ve learned not to have personal ghosts. I’d advise you to do the same.”

“You advise me? There is nothing you can do for me.” He stood there, well sort of hovered.

I spoke to him again in a calm quiet voice. “I can do the scary paranormal stuff to make you go away, or if you want to talk about it I’d be glad to listen. Like you just pointed out I’ve been around for a while and like to think I have a little bit of life experience.”

I took a deep breath and put out my hand expecting it to go right through his heart but instead I touched something solid. He stood before me looking shocked as if unable to move. For the first time I could see his face as if he were alive. My ghost was younger than I thought, fine features, flawless skin, glossy black hair, eyes as blue as a morning sky. I could read him as if I was reading my own thoughts. If only for a few seconds I had him. I had the Ghost.

I’d broken into his mind. If he’d lived he would have been 53 years old now. He was 26 when he died, just a few weeks shy of his 27th birthday, a birthday he shared with me. His heart was full of regrets and anger and grief, too much for a man of his young age. But despite the fact it didn’t show on his face, he was old beyond his years. There was a woman, a betrayal, violence, and the vision of a fresh grave and his own new grave next to it surrounded by white flowers. There was heart-break and anger. Someone loved him very much. A large crowd gathered around. He tried to speak but couldn’t. I had a grip on him and wouldn’t let him go. There was a song playing in the background, at first Master of Puppets by Metallica, it was new that year, 1986, but there was another song. 1983, Duran Duran, Hold Back the Rain. What was going on? I wouldn’t have expected that but it came into my head full blast like from a car stereo on a cold raining night after a funeral and an argument. It was so random.

Yes we’re miles away from nowhere and the wind doesn’t have a name
So call it what you want to call it still blows down the lane
People tell me I haven’t changed at all but I don’t feel the same
And I’ve bet you’ve had that feeling too you can’t laugh all the time

And if the fires burn out there’s only fire to blame (hold back the rain)
No time for worry cause we’re on the roam again (hold back the rain)
The clouds all scatter and we ride the outside lane (hold back the rain)
Not on your own so help me please hold back the rain

“Stop.” he gasped and tried to break loose.

I took my hand away and he stood there looking at me in shock and horror. The temperature dropped at least 40 degrees. Ice crystals formed on the sleeve of my shirt. I took a breath and realized my fangs were out. I could almost taste the fear in him.

“What are you afraid of?” I whispered.

“I’m afraid of you Juliette.” And then he vanished without another word. I wanted to feel angry but the experience left me feeling sad.

Isn’t it always like a ghost to get one off track. Think about it.

Don’t look back unless it is for memories only. Live in the present and make the best of your time there.  Look to the future with hope and excitement.

It still seems so weird the ghost and I have the same birthday – a hundred years apart. Hmmmm.

~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman (and ghost whisperer extraordinaire)

gothic

Credit: Hold back the rain: Songwriters: Taylor, Roger Andrew / Taylor, John / Taylor, Andy / Le Bon, Simon / Rhodes, Nick

For more about the Ghost click here or here or here or here.

13 thoughts on “Don’t haunt yourself (because real ghost are bad enough)

  1. Pingback: Don’t haunt yourself (because real ghost are bad enough) | West Coast Review

    • Yes I am. I was just thinking the other day of the work involved in making a book and weaving this all together. Some of the stories have been published in anthology with the WPaD group (now on Amazon). The ghost is quite popular – something that came to a surprise for me. And yes, he does have his own story somewhere else.

  2. THIS, my dear Juliette, was VERY interesting, fascinating and very sensitive as well. Am I wrong or did you for the first time “feel” what’s driving this ghost, and what he’s still holding on?
    Very special!!!

    • The frustration level of a ghost can be unimaginable, especially when you have Vampires in your life. Even regular people can cause pain and the “what if” feelings or “What was supposed to be” especially in one so young as Nigel (that is his given name). My husband was the same age, only 26 when he became a vampire and shares some of the same frustrations. Then again when I was 26…but that is another story. All creatures while in pain seem to lash out at those who try to help them. Fear and pain are stronger than love and hope in most cases. I’ll keep you posted.

  3. Pingback: At the Epiphany Cafe: Without Memory or Desire | The Narrative Imperative: Tell Stories or Die

  4. Pingback: Ghost story follow up… | Vampire Maman

  5. Pingback: A year ago I started Vampire Maman… | Vampire Maman

  6. Pingback: A Year With The Ghost | Vampire Maman

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