Ask Juliette (Ask A Vampire – Advice for Everyone) is a regular Thursday feature here on Vampire Maman. These are all real questions from real readers. If you have questions about anything (and I mean anything) send me a note at juliettevampiremom @ gmail .com
I finally worked up the courage to ask… or say something about many different things. I go through a lot every day, as do most people. Let me begin my saying, I’m someone who suffers from bouts of depression. It’s something I’ve only recently been able to talk about with people. This step I’ve taken, I somewhat regret. I placed my trust in people who I now think don’t like talking about it. It leaves me in a place of deeper loneliness and on top of that, life isn’t slowing down. I stress about my life all the time and people who constantly surround me make me feel guilty for choosing a path that helps me with my depression.
These two groups are friends and family. I’ve trimmed my friends a great number. The friends I have now, I consider dear to my heart, but sometimes, when they avoid talking about something weighing me down, I wonder, do I matter to them as much as they matter to me? And my family, well… what can I say… To them, it’s like a cold. Take medicine, sleep it off, and the morning next, I should be fine.
Taking this all into consideration, what do you think I should do to keep myself from falling down the rabbit hole I’ve only so recently climbed out of?
~ Sincerely, Not Alice
Dear Not Alice,
I saw your email in the wee hours of the morning. It really moved me.
The fact that you’ve recognized that you have depression and that you are dealing with it is something you should be proud of. It is never easy. It is a huge step.
A lot of people never talk about it to others. There is still a stigma about depression. It is uncomfortable to deal with for everyone.
It is never easy for others to hear someone suffers from depression. People tend to not want to talk about health issues, especially mental health, because it makes them uncomfortable.
The one thing being a creative person teaches you is to face rejection. It also teaches you to dig deeper inside of yourself than most people can ever imagine. I want you to know that. It doesn’t mean rejection gets easier, it just means you’ll learn to handle it better than most people – and not take it personally.
Is it going to be easy? Absolutely not. Are there going to be rewards. Absolutely YES.
In life there are those people who have a five-year plan. There are those who know at age 20 what they’ll be doing at age 30. And you know what? Life happens. Companies fold, people die, opportunities happen, people fall in love, or you just change your mind. Take it all, take everything, as an experience to learn and grow.
Be good to yourself. Have fun with yourself. Love yourself. Be your own best friend.
At the same time know that your friends and family who are there for you LOVE YOU. Yes, they do. Sometimes it is just hard to show it in the ways you want them to. Not only do they want you to be happy but they want to see you happy. Show them a smile. Tell them something positive. Make it a habit. I know it sounds like Sunday/Kindergarten stuff but it works.
The one thing I can tell you, from my own experience, is to never embrace Depression. Do not be kind to it. Do not consider it your friend. Do not see it as part of you. It is not who you are. Depression isn’t like a cold. You don’t just get over it. But you can learn to give it the middle finger and be strong.
I bet you have more talent in your little finger than most people have in their entire bodies. So seek out inspiration, new experiences, and things that make your happy. Don’t worry so much what others think. They aren’t you.
So what should you do to keep out of the rabbit hole?
Be good to yourself.
Most of all keep creative.
Find new activities (and new friends)
Don’t be a hermit.
Know that you are not defined by depression.
Know that you are loved.
Get professional help if you feel you need it.
Learn from your experiences and mistakes (and learn from the experiences and mistakes of others.)
And learn from your own success. Celebrate your success, even the small things.
I’m not an expert or a medical professional. I’m just someone with a lot of life experience who observes and records everything in the crammed small space I call my brain.
Take a deep breath. One day you’ll look back and want to hug the younger you. So go ahead and give yourself that hug now. I know it is hard. It is really hard. But you’re on the right path. Just keep going. Never stop.
Hugs ~ Juliette
My cat has recently taken to vampirism. At first he was noshing nightly on rats and raccoons, but over the past month he’s gone and drained poor Aunt Milly dry. We buried her last week. What’s to be done? And should we expect Aunt Milly back?
~ Guy with a Cat
I consulted with my friend Adam, who also just happens to be a Werewolf and expert on shape changers.
It looks like Aunty Milly might come back but as a rare North American Werelynx. I doubt if your kitty did all of the blood draining. He had help. Werelynx frequently hand out with house kitties and their unsuspecting owners. Aunt Milly might do quiet well under the full moon with her new beautiful fur, tufted ears, and take-no-shit attitude. Keep me posted and let me know what happens. And remember to keep some rabbits or raw meat around so she won’t be tempted to eat any family members.
Can vampires get a suntan?
~ Malibu Barbie
Unfortunately no. Even Vampires of color are sensitive to the sun. We buy sunscreen by the gallon. When we’re in the sun we can get violently ill. My son had problems with that in high school. I was always going up to school to pick him up until I had a serious talk with the PE coach. Thank goodness they only have to have PE for the first two years.
Believe it or not, Vampire don’t tan but we do get amazing freckle blooms. That is something most people don’t know.
Spray tan sounds like a logical option for Vampires who want that just-back-from vacation-in-Arizona-glow. But, being the stylish and classy creatures we are, we don’t spray tan. I mean, seriously, look at a certain orange buffoon running for president and his tacky orange wife. Yikes. They’re scary monsters to say the least.
Can Vampires diet?
Sure, but why?
Where is Waldo?
~ Still Looking
Dear Still Looking,
With the Goblin King.
Did you know Edgar Allen Poe?
~ Fan of Eddie
Dear Fan of Eddie,
No, he died before I was born.
Edgar Poe – January 19, 1809 – October 7, 1849
Juliette Kings – October 23, 1859 – Not Dead Yet.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
I already answered this burning question in a previous post but here it is again.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
~ Tongue Tied
Dear Tongue Tied,
If a woodchuck could chuck wood it wouldn’t be much. They have little bitty arms and can’t throw logs like some great big Vampire guy could. I’d say after a hefty pile of kindling, say about a twenty-five gallon drum full the poor little critter would be exhausted for a week.
That is it for this week. Thank you everyone for all of the questions. I hope I’ve been able to help. If you have a burning question about life, parenting, relationships, mysterious stuff, paranormal, Vampires or ANYTHING for next week just email me at juliettevampiremom @ gmail .com
~ Juliette aka Vampire Maman